Wolverine Scouts
by sweet-n-sassy928
Summary: Logan is given control of the summer plans...let the reign of terror begin.  Prank wars, ghost stories,and general craziness ensues as Kitty, Rogue, Piotr, and of course the ragin' Cajun himself, Remy LeBeau make mischief and romance.
1. The Beginning of the End

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution**

"This _would_ be happening to me." Kitty whined, "I swear, like, has Logan ever heard of a _break_?"

"For da record, I blame Bobby. And Scott." Gambit said, holding the straps on a camo back pack, trudging up a hill.

Everyone glared at Bobby: while they were on a tour of the awesome summer resort and spa they were _supposed_ to be spending their vacation at, he decided to freeze the pool; needless to say, they weren't invited back. So the professor handed control of summer plans to Logan. And this happened. As for Scott, Remy just thought everything was his fault. Knowing his suck up persona, he was probably psyched to spend the summer conditioning, getting all dirty and sweaty and tired. Loser.

"I don't do sunshine." Rogue slathered Banana Boat SPF 50 on her pale skin. _Shoulda drained Bobby when Ah had the chance. But then he wouldn't get to enjoy this wonderful experience with us_. She glared at him as he mocked Kitty from two feet behind. "Stop it frosty! Before Ah inform Logan you hacked into the computer to mess up the danger room for a week!" She called, just loud enough for Logan to hear.

Twenty feet ahead of the campers, he turned and snarled "Front and center snowman!"

He glared at Rogue. She smirked, waving a sarcastic goodbye to him. Oh yeah. She was draining him at the end of this.

In old combat boots, an ill fitted work out t, and crocodile Dundee shorts, Kitty found the worst part of this trip to be the fashion. She _was_ wearing an uber cute safari-ish Jane of the jungle dress with bronze gladiator sandals- that was nature-y right? No. Wolverine totally made a scene and forced her to change like 50 times until she was in this…this… this hot mess.

The first thing she intended to do when she got to camp was change out of this hideous ensemble.

Under pressure from the scorching sun, Rogue pulled her hair up- not in a usual medium low bun, but in a high, preppy cute pony tail (like Kitty Pryde status). Her white, side swept bangs slipped from the rest of her auburn locks. Remy raised an eyebrow at her.

"What?" she snapped. "It's hot." She folded her arms over her chest. She, the most covered of the group, wore black combat boots, army pants, and a simple, three quarter sleeve, black t shirt. Her ivory skin did not take well to the sunlight. In her "I-can-love-you-and-hate-you-at-the-same-time" signature look, she shot Remy a glance. He half smiled at her acknowledgment of his existence. She, in the most exaggerated way possible without making a total announcement of it, rolled her emerald eyes.

Most would refer to the hike to camp a rocky, cardiac arrest inducing, winding road of doom: Logan called it a brisk stroll. It didn't look like it was all that difficult for Piotr either.

Kitty (subconsciously) gazed at the giant Russian as he easily maneuvered the terrain. Quiet, yes. Reserved, a little. But there was also a bright red check mark next to handsome. And sweet. _Sweet would be different…_

"Stop staring Kit." Rogue whispered. "Your trail of drool might disturb the ecosystem- and you look like Scot when Jean leaves. Which is never okay." She exaggerated a shudder at the thought of the pansy lost puppy look. "But for the record, Pete is better than Lance. He takes showers regularly." She snickered at her cutting humor.

"Oh ha-ha." Kitty through her hands up, palms open, framing her face, imitating a perfect Rogue southern accent. "Miss Ah liked one-eye."

"Low point." Rogue shuddered again. "Low point."

At the top of a hill, feet shoulder with apart, Logan stood and inhaled the crisp untouched air.

_OMG. He's totally getting in touch with his inner nature man._ Kitty cringed. Her natural habitat included Panda Express, teens, and Forever 21 (if you guessed the mall, congrats for duh, winning). This whole "wilderness" thing was like throwing a house cat in the jungle: it only had the potential to end badly.

"Campers!" Logan bellowed so that the group stilled. "Just down hill is where we make camp."

A series of thankful and relieved moans rose from the miserable exhausted half roasted teens. Kitty squatted with her hands on her knees. Gambit- he insisted on wearing that dang trench coat- wiped sweat from his face. "_You never know mon ami, it may come in handy_." Rogue simmered; she didn't like it when she simmered.

"But," Logan smirked after a long pause. This is a guy who never even cracks a smile. If he smirks, you _know_ something terrible is about to go down. The crowd sighed. Kitty thought she could have cried at the sight of that insidious half smile. "Since I want this to be an authentic camping experience, without all your cellular phones, portable computers, and music devices, free of all excess materials that keep you from really getting in touch with nature" he paused like a dramatic dictator "I am going to be collecting all your excess luggage now. That's right campers- everything but what's on your back goes in that bin." He pointed to a dilapidated tan metal storage container to their right. Everyone gaped. Rogue and Kitty's jaws fell.

_Great. Just great_.

_**Later**_

"This," Kitty gestured at her detestable outfit "This is not okay." She pointed to the storage bin at the top of the hill. "That is not okay." She looked at the ill assembled tent in front of her. As if her stare were too much pressure, it collapsed. "Ugh! This is like, torture!" She flopped down in the sandy earth, knees bent, head in her hands.

"Specially since Logan's nice and cozy in his deluxe cabin." Rogue scoffed as she flipped through the tent assembly manual for the sixth time. "Ah don't have any makeup. What am Ah going to do in the morning?" The unlikely friends pouted on the dusty ground- until a certain raging Cajun slipped into their midst.

Rogue shot the arrogant card shark a what-are-you-doing- here look. His lips curved in a closed half smile. He sat in the dirt next to them. Pulling a deck of cards from his pocket, he shuffled them with quick accuracy. Kitty looked at Rogue with an "Uh…?" face, before Rogue swatted away the silence.

"What do you want Cajun?" She looked back down at the manual, like it was a new copy of seventeen, and Remy wasn't the totally attractive mysterious newcomer.

"Couldn't help but over hear your problems cherie." He shrugged without stopping the shuffle. "Thought maybe I could help." Mischievous glint in his eye, he smirked.

"We don't need your help." Rogue flicked the page "So go back where you came from Swamp Rat."

He started to get up before Kitty grabbed his shoulder to keep him on the ground.

"Wait" she said. "If it means I salvage my stuff I'm so in."

Rogue glared at her perky friend. _Don't go there Kitty_. But she had that please-please-please looked sprawled over her pretty features.

"Fahn!" Rogue threw her hands up. "But if we get in trouble it's your head. Got that?"

Gambit put both hands over his heart. "Chère!" he cried, "I am wounded that you think so little of me." he said, melodramatically. She rolled her jewel green eyes. "First rule of thievery chere: don't get caught." He winked. This time slightly blushing, she rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"So what's the plan?" In an attempt to murder the slowly growing awkwardness, Kitty clapped her hands together under her chin. "Are we like, totally going to bust a mission?"

Remy chuckled at her excitement. "You could say dat petit. But first, we need one more homme for da plan to work." He looked in Piotr's direction as the three of them stood up. Kitty's hand touched her hair, then adjusted her ill-fitted t. "Easy chaton" he chuckled "No guarantee he will do it." he smirked as he strode, hands in his pockets, toward the Russian.

"I know why you don't like him." Kitty scowled and folded her arms. They fallowed slowly.

"Aye Pete." Remy gave him the we're-bros nod.

"Hello Remy." Pete smiled.

"I got a proposition for you Petie." The Cajun's eyes shifted over the camp, just to make sure no one else was watching.

"This sounds unlawful." His smile fell.

"No," Remy swatted the accusation away "It's just a little… recon."

Pete looked uneasily at Wolverine's cabin. "I don't know…"

"Come on," Remy grabbed Kitty's wrist and pulled her in front of him so she stood facing Piotr. "She's in. You'd be helping the chatonnn." He smiled with a toothy grin. Kitty turned neon red.

"Alright." His blue eyes locked with hers, then met Remy's. "What is the plan?"

"Glad you asked." A conniving grin spread over his handsome face. "Meet here at midnight." He scanned the group. "Da less you know da better. Disperse." He said. He swaggered away to nowhere. With puzzled expressions, and unclear thoughts, they parted.


	2. Mission: Awesome

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution**

"This is so awesome!" Kitty whisper squealed as they leaned out of the two foot high tent door (Assembled courtesy of Pete). Excitement stirred from her smile to her finger tips.

"Shhhh!" Rogue hissed with her index finger over her lips. She tilted her head to her left. They _would_ get stuck next to Scott the tattle tail's tent.

Kitty's mouth smacked shut. They tip-toed through the clusters of ill assembled tents. The girls rolled their eyes at Scott's immaculate Boy-Scout set up. _He would be over achiever camper man. _They maneuvered in the dark to where Remy shuffled cards, and Colossus' silver surface reflected the moonlight.

"Took you long enough ladies." Gambit smirked.

Rogue glared at him through the dark. At the same time she hoped most of her makeup was still intact.

"Quit messing around Cajun." Rogue pulled her arms over her chest.

"Yeah," Kitty said "What's the plan?"

"Alright," Remy began to pace in a circle like a football coach giving a pregame speech. "I've constructed da simplest plan possible, as you are all beginners" he chuckled inwardly "We got a distraction, if need be" he gestured at Pete, "A look out," he pointed to Rogue "An 'in'" he pointed to Kitty "And an expert." He grinned.

"Look out?" Rogue put her hands on her hips.

"An 'in'?" Kitty cocked a perfectly shaped brow.

"Are you going to listen?" They silenced. "As I was saying," he restarted his pacing "If Logan comes out Pete is going to inform him of a _problem_ wit' da outhouse." He snickered as he said it. Observing Kitty's silent ew, he continued. "Relax chaton, we didn't actually do anything to da bathroom. Now here's where it gets interesting.

"If Logan comes out, da distraction only lasts so long. We need a look out," He nodded at Rogue "To inform us if things have gone awry. Here's how dat will go: you absorb my powers. Take a few cards and charge dem. I'll be watching.

"Dat leaves me and you chaton. You phase us into da bin, an' Remy make it look like we were never dere." He rubbed his hands together.

"What if Ah don't want to absorb your powers?" Rogue puckered. Three sets of eyes widened at her. "Ugh. Fahn!" she stomped toward him. A little fearful, (she hadn't used her powers much since Professor X put up mental blocks that allowed her control of her powers) she placed her ungloved hands on his temples. She exhaled a shaky breath.

"I trust you chere." He smiled; she rolled her gem colored eyes. "You know we could make dis interestin'," His eyes lingered on her lips "How 'bout giving Remy a kiss."

"Don't bet your life on it." She blushed, thankful for the dark. The proximity made her heart flutter. "Be still."

"Wasn't planning on moving anywhere." He winked.

More eye rolling. She concentrated; she allowed just a hint of her powers to manifest in her fingertips, so she would absorb his powers without totally weakening him.

She plucked the cards from his hand- pulling out the two of hearts, concentrating until it glowed hot pink, then reabsorbing the charge. She cringed.

"Hurts a little don't it?" Remy said, "Let's do dis quick." He nodded at Kitty as they set off at a jog.

A reasonable distance from Logan's cabin, out of sight, tucked away from the other campers Rogue and Pete waited in the dark. Without any reason to remain in Colossus form, he shrunk into regular Pete.

Kitty and Remy jogged up the hill. This was like, totally ridiculous-she shouldn't have to steal back her own property. But whatever, busting a stealthy mission like this totally moved her up on the awesome coolness scale (she now considered herself a single level under Chuck Norris. You don't get much more awesome than that.)

They sneaked around the bin, like Logan would leap out of it if the slightest noise disturbed it. Remy, relishing the opportunity to reenact his glory days (even if it _was_ with a group of amateurs) rubbed his hands together. Before Kitty phased through the door, he grabbed her wrist.

"Only one item per costumer mon ami."

"What? Why?"

"Don't want no one to notice dat nothins missing- or dat we all toting around sometin' extra. First rule chaton-"

"Don't get caught. Yeah yeah." She phased through, pulling Remy only half way in, so he could keep a look out for "the signal". She giggled inwardly- how awesome was that? They had _a signal_.

"Da key is to leave everything looking like it was. Don' touch anything you don' have to," he pointed to Pete's bag on the far side of the storage "Sketch book petit." He whispered.

As she leaned, careful not to bump anything, toward Pete's backpack Remy lifted the bag he strategically placed on the end (yes my dears- his thieving mind had churned over this plan from the moment Wolvie made his little announcement) and stealthily removed a few personal items (as well as _borrowing_ a thing or two from another annoying/ unsuspecting party- but we'll get to that later ;D). Kitty phased through the bag to pull out a half used well kept sketchbook with charcoal and pencil attached. When she set the bag down she looked for Remy's approval.

"Little to da left." She tilted it until he nodded.

Oh yeah. This was going in her book of awesome.

_**Meanwhile**_

Rogue attempted to absorb the darkness before the sun scorched her again the next day. Pete looked up at the stars. She liked that they didn't have to blabber on for their mild friendship to be good.

"Rogue, may I ask you something?"

"Course Pete." She smiled up at him.

He blushed, embarrassed and rethinking the question. "Do you know if Katya-"

Logan's door burst opened. Their heads snapped toward the sudden shatter of the stillness.

"Ah think that's your cue."

Pete nodded and rushed to meet the anti-camp counselor. Rogue nervously monitored the conversation- she couldn't charge the card until Logan was in the bathroom, away from where he could see the magenta glow.

Pete made frantic gestures. Logan scowled. He snarled, setting off toward the "damaged" outhouse. As he stepped in the door Remy poked his head outside. Rogue waved a charged pink card in the air, careful not to set off an explosion that would alert the entire camp to their thievery.

"Time to go!" Remy's head popped back in. He grabbed tighter on Kitty's wrist, yanking her out.

"Wait!" She yelped. But it was too late. She was outside witnessing the potential horror of Logan stomping out of the not-damaged outhouse.

Oh crap.

Remy, still clutching her wrist, led her in a sprint through the woods. "Come on!" He whisper yelled.

_If we get through this, we are_ so _more awesome than Chuck Norris_. She clung to the salvaged contraband in her other hand. Gambit whispered in quick, furious French- she could only assume he was swearing.

_**Meanwhile**_

_Ah gotta do something_. Logan stormed out of the outhouse. She skipped up to them as Pete fumbled to explain what was going on.

"What'sallthecommotionaboutfellas?" she spat out so fast it sounded like one word. _Did Ah really just say fellas?_

"Rogue!" Wolverine snarled "What are you doing out here?"

"Well- uhhh," she looked around for an inspired excuse "I had to, uh, use the restroom?" she blurted out, mentally face palming for making it sound more like a question than a statement.

"That's funny cuz Tin-man here seemed to think it was busted." He snapped his head to Pete, who shrugged helplessly.

"Uh, well…" she blinked "I was having trouble. You know girl-"

"Stop. Please." He pinched the bridge of his nose.

"So it might have sounded like somethin' …was… busted." She looked back and forth. They stared at her, no motion, whatsoever. Pete turned the color of strawberry. Silence. _This_, was truly awkward silence. "What are you doing up?" She shifted her weight back and forth from her toes to her heels.

"I came out to howl at the moon." He flailed a hairy arm at the crescent in the sky. "I needed to go to the broken down bathroom." He shook his head. "I don't know what's going on here, but I don't like it." He looked back and forth at them. Rogue widened her eyes and parted her lips in an attempt to look innocent. "I'll be watching you. Now if you excuse me," he brushed past them to the bathroom. When he stepped in the door, their bodies untensed. Rogue offered a high five; he returned with a shy, gentle, massive hand.

_**Elsewhere**_

Remy led Kitty back to camp, the long way. Through the forest. As they neared the cluster of tents, he slowed.

"I got a question for you chaton," he murmured, leaning his back against a tree, eyeing the camp from the side.

"Is now really the time?" She mirrored him against a slender pine.

"It's always the time petit," he smirked "You know if Rogue got a love interest?"

"Rogue? No." The pieces clicked together in her head. A smile tugged at her pink lips. "You? And… Rogue?" She cupped her hand over her mouth to contain her noisy laughter. "Really?"

"I'm serious chaton!" His face fell. Kitty regretted being so insensitive. He looked so… disheartened, when she made it seem like it wouldn't work.

"I'll try to help you out." She stuck out her hand in a gesture of truce. "We are kind of now bonded by mutual awesomeness."

He smirked and took her tiny hand "Oui." He pointed to the camp. "On the count of three: une, deux, trios!" They darted back into the camp- total MI III status before-

"Oof!" Kitty grunted as she rammed into Rogue.

"You're back!" The Goth whisper shouted. Kitty, now semi-thief (but not really because it _was_ her stuff), nodded with a giddy smile.

Kitty handed Pete his book and bounced in place, biting her lower lip with a goofy giggle Rogue could only assume was her this-is-so-awesome face.

"I think" Gambit looked around "We can call it a night."

"Hey," Rogue's brow furrowed. "What about mah stuff? What did you grab for me?"

"Welllll," Kitty avoided eye contact. "See, you gave us the signal before I could grab your stuff so…"

Rogue gaped. Kitty felt herself shrink at least four feet.

Remy, feeling the awkward tension, hissed "Disperse."

"'Kay goodnight!" Kitty spat before he uttered the last syllable. She hustled back to the tent, not bothering to realize it was Rogue's tent too.

So Rogue gaped there for a few minutes after Pete gave her a sad shrug.

This _would_ happen to her.

_Everything. Sucks_.


	3. Meddling Kids

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution. All that good stuff.**

Kitty's heart sighed as she contemplated what she was about to do. It was a small sacrifice, really, seeing as she already broke Remy's "one item only" rule (but we'll touch on that later). She clutched the brand new Bobbi Brown make up kit (complete with adorable bronze carrying case) in her palms- proud that she only swiped one brown mini eye pencil for herself: like she would really go _completely_ without makeup. Puh-lease.

"For you," Kitty pushed the metallic bag in Rogue's stunned face. "It's not as dark as your usual stuff; I was going for like, sparkly granola, because, y'know, it's camping. Don't want to be to glitzy."

A soft smile flowed to Rogue's face. She half hugged her odd choice of companion. "Thanks Kit," she pulled the zipper across the brick sized bag to pull out: A soft, shimmery peach and bronze dual eye shadow, bright pink blush, light pink shimmer lip gloss, brushes and a coco brown mini eye pencil. Not her usual child of the dark set up, but it was better than nothing- and light and natural was probably better to keep Logan's "_all seeing eyes_" (sarcasm) off their prohibited goodies.

"What did you keep?" Rogue cocked a brow at Kitty, who shyly lifted brown eyeliner. Rogue rolled her green eyes and laughed. "It's a little light," Rogue puckered, and Kitty made her offended face. "But it'll do," she said. She leaned down and began to unzip the tent door.

"Better than all that black crap you smear all over your visage," Kitty murmured with a pout.

"What?" Rogue turned around. Kitty shook her head innocently. "Stop using big words when you're angry." She turned back to the door to see-

"Ah!" she screamed. Without thinking, to distract him from her lack of makeup, she grabbed the nearest object, Kitty's pillow, and threw it in his face.

"Whoa chere!" He grabbed it. It instantly burned fuchsia and burst into a flurry of scorched white fluff. "No need to get violent." Stunned, she blinked. He analyzed her face: untouched, softer, lighter than usual- refreshing. It seemed cliché to him, but, though she was always pretty, her natural features could out rank an angels. He smiled; she soured.

"What are you doin' here?" She snapped, cutting him off before he could respond. "You shouldn't sit outside people's rooms like that. It's creepy- and stalkerish." She shoved past him like she didn't care that he had seen her unpainted face. He stood awkwardly with a stunned, gaping Kitty.

A moment too late, Kitty finally snapped "Heck no! I know you did not just blow up my pillow! This is like, total debauchery!"

"Gotta go petite!" He said, chasing Rogue "Excusez-moi!" he said over his shoulder.

"Wait up chere," he called. His black boots stepped with hers: moving when she moved, stepping as she stepped. Her green eyes, worth more than any jewels; her face couldn't be more perfect if it was painted by Da Vinci; being next to her was worth more than Solomon's temple. He'd stolen priceless gems before, but this was different: he wanted this differently; this was a challenge, was worth more in a way he could neither admit, nor understand.

He liked her. Sincerely- not just in the trivial way he chased after girls before. She was different-

She couldn't stand him.

And we always want what if we can't have- especially when we happen to be master thieves that have a knack for finding ways to obtain the unobtainable, _non_?

"You got something to say Cajun?" She said, coming to a stop. She looked him up and down defiantly. Soft, shoulder length auburn hair, ocean eyes, and ivory skin that could kill him if he got too close- no wonder she was the one the past scoundrel locked his sights on. "It's not polite to ogle." She tilted her head to the side with a cocky grin.

As he smirked back he said "Yo' da one dat said 'ogle'".

Her face toppled flat. In a secluded, not yet sun scorched patch of grass, she flopped down. He- with his messy hair, and his ebony and ruby eyes, and his stupid charming smile- gently and hesitantly loomed over her.

"You got anything to say Gambit or did you to you just come to make me feel awkward."

He looked to the clusters of grey vinyl tents. He pointed to the one he shared with Pete, then to Rogue and Kitty's. "Petite and Petie. Sounds like a good combination. Just flows- non?"

Rogue squinted at him for a moment. "No. Oh no LeBeau." She shook her head so her hair flung against her face. "_You_ can play matchmaker. Not me- _Ah'm_ not a meddler."

"It's not meddling," he said (but yes my pretties- our dear Gambit was totally meddling). "Remy's just observing. Petie's shy chere." He shrugged "I just taught it would be my duty as a good friend to get some information." His smirk flattened. "I don't want him to get hurt or anything like dat. You feel like dat about da chaton no?"

He looked sincere enough- and, oddly enough, knew what he meant about worrying over friend's love interest.

"What information?" she tilted her head and tucked her hair behind her ear.

"Like is she still wit da fearless leader of da masked morons?"

"They don't wear masks." She chuckled "And not right now, but it changes- so if he wants to do something, tell him to do it quick." She bit her lip "Like now, while she can't see captain fruit-bowl and he can't woo her back into his grungy arms." She faked a swoon. He chuckled.

Okay, so she didn't know if this counted as meddling- but come on: it was Pete vs. Lance. She would way rather meddle her towards Pete than leave her susceptible to more Lance.

"Thanks cherie." He half smiled.

_**Meanwhile**_

Distraught, with the fluffy remains of her pillow surrounding her and thoughts of the torture Wolverine intended to inflict on them Monday, (_oh crap, that's tomorrow_) diving her mood into the dirt- and furthermore, her best friend abandoning her in this lonely tent- Kitty wandered to the dusty wooden picnic bench by the bathrooms (btw- ew. Whose idea was that?) To absorb some sunshine.

In the warmth of the light she laid on the bench, eyes closed, arms overhead. She rolled up the sleeves of her ill fitted t-shirt and pulled it up to bring the gift of color to bleached white midriff. It was totally criminal the meager clothing rations Logan let them keep.

As she was about to roll over to keep herself even, the heat of the sun vanished into shadow. She squeezed her eyes shut tighter.

"Come on Logan! I'm not even doing anything stupid! I just don't want to be the victim of Bobby's white jokes when we go swimmingggg."

"You have a lovely skin tone Katya," A sweet Russian voice twirled in her ears. "It suits you." He said softly, totally ignoring her embarrassment at calling him Logan like the imbecile she was.

"Pete!" she sat up straight as a level, stunned. "I had no idea it was you!" Her cheeks turned the color of a fresh red Crayola crayon. She blinked her wide blue eyes. After a moment of embarrassing silent idiocy, she threw her bare legs off the side of the bench and patted the seat next to her. She stared at her French manicured toes, with their little aqua Hawaiian flowers on the inner corners of her big toes, in hopes that she'd be inspired with an incredibly witty comment to recover from this stupidity.

Nothing.

So he recovered for her. "You look very nice Katya," he smiled and she sat there like a dope. "I wanted to say thank you, for last night," he scanned the open, green scenery, breathing in the golden green scent of pine and dust, then her face- creamy skin, strawberry-frosting pink cheeks, sapphire eyes, all framed by milk chocolate satin locks. "The notebook," he focused in the exact center of her pupil. Her heart rattled. "It meant a lot to me."

"No problem," she replied to the soft Russian accent that set off tiny sparks on her insides "If you didn't like, keep Logan from snooping I would have been like, totally dead anyway, so like, yeah." _Way to babble like a moron Kitty_.

"Nonetheless," he half smiled through closed lips, "I'm grateful, Katya"

As he stood to leave she frowned. She felt the tips of hair and smoothed the unflattering top.

"Thank you, again."

"Yeah, totally. We should like totally do it again," she blabbered as her head bobbled and he nodded. _Shut up Kitty! Just shut up!_ When he was a safe distance away, she hit her head on the ancient wood table top.

_Nice. We'll he's going to think I'm a genius_. She sighed. But how could she have helped it? It was like her brain function dissolved when he came around.

Thump, thump, thump went her forehead.


	4. Everybody to the Starting Line

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution**

6 am. At 6 am Logan's growl sounded through the dirty beige speakers attached to the flag pole on his roof.

"Morning simpletons." Static popped through the camp "If you know what's good for you, you'll be lined up in front of the danger course, FIVE MINUTES AGO! That is all."

Kitty cringed. Rogue glared at her for advancing Logan's vocabulary.

Logan gloated about the "danger course" from the moment Bobby ruined paradise. It was a non-electronic natural alternative to the danger room: a rigid, rural pathway of cruel slow death. Really, the ideal version of torture for mutant teens- or so he said. But this was Logan. What he envisioned and what actually focused long enough to _plan_ were to very different things.

Rogue and Kitty stumbled through the half dark into the line of groggy kids. Bobby let out an exaggerated yawn, while Scott (of course) stood straight and ready to go. Rogue rolled her eyes at the over achiever_. Low point. Low point_.

Logan growled; the trickle of whispers ceased, the tired complaints eliminated. Bobby, like a moron, raised his hand.

"Are you raising your hand Drake?" Logan squinted at him in hostile disbelief.

"Uh yeah," he said "Aren't we supposed to like, have breakfast? Cause I'm starving."

"We will have breakfast WHEN YOU HAVE BURNED OFF THE 300 CALORIES TO EARN IT!" Logan roared, the veins in his neck looked like they might explode. The line took a sheepish step back. "Now," he said, pacing like a demented scientist, ready to expose his evil plot. "My first announcement is going to hurt me, more than it is going to hurt you."

Kitty rolled her eyes because 1) How trite and 2) That wasn't even possible.

"As a little side note for you this was not my idea- Chuck's the one who approved it. If you've got a beef, take it up with him"

Boredom swayed under Rogue's fair skin; it tilted her eyes from side to side, until it scraped down her thoughts. _Oh mah gosh, he's not here_.

As Logan ranted about the professor making decisions without him, steps crunched up in the gravel behind her. Remy, late and disoriented, rubbed his face.

"LeBeauuuu!" Logan snarled "Nice of you to join us. You've just volunteered to go first." He snarled with a sarcastic smile. "As I was saying," he began his maniacal pacing again. "Chuck thought it would be a good idea to branch out. Me? I don't like it." he folded his hands behind his back. "Charles wants to think everyone has potential- but let's face it, some of you losers will never amount to anything." He looked at Bobby. "So, meet your new team."

Like a scene from a cheesy movie, at the exact end of the phrase, a dilapidated bus pulled up. Out came captain fruit bowl and the rest of the slack jawed cadets.

"The brotherhood?" Scott stepped forward like the self-proclaimed leader he was.

"Non. It's da Teletubbies." Remy said with a sarcastic smirk. He squeezed his deck of cards so that they shot from one hand to the other.

"Lance?" Kitty said, fully awake, eyes the size of Texas.

"Kitty." Lance smirked, leaning against the rusty old bus.

Ninja stars shot from Rogue's forest green eyes. Her hands dropped to her hips. "What are you smiling about biker boy? You have a mullet."

He glared at her. "You're one to talk about hair styles skunkie." The smirk reemerged.

Rogue and Kitty both opened their mouths to retort, but Remy interrupted "Watch yo'self. That's big talk for a guy with a pickle jar on his head." Remy stepped forward, legs firm in the dirt, red eyes locked.

"Is this over them?" Lance scoffed. "Cause neither of them is worth the embarrassment you are about to get served."

Kitty frowned, biting her lower lip. Pete's eyelids dropped slightly and he leaned forward. His jaw clenched, he rolled his hand into a now metallic fist.

"Well den," the deck of cards glowed pink; his ruby and ebony eyes shined with the spark of challenge.

"THAT IS ENOUGH!" Logan snarled. His adamantium claws shot out. "I don't care if you kill each other- but it won't be on my time while I can get sued for it!"

_Logan would say that_, Rogue sighed. Kitty's frown wandered into her vision. _Great_, she shook her black cherry colored nails through her ivory and auburn hair, _as a friend Ah suppose it's mah duty to do something about this_.

Logan babbled sarcastically about "peace and harmony" and all that nonsense. Scott sulked as he stared at the group of sloppy delinquents. He twitched at the sight of the mustard stain on Blob's shirt and the various wrinkles in Toad's disastrous get up. Remy boiled in his anger over being forced to back out of a fight.

After Logan's "peace and harmony" speech, he stood with his legs spaced a little past his shoulders in an I-have-more-authority-than-you stance. "That being said, training will not be delayed" a sick grin curled over his face, his light stubble fallowing the curve of his smile. "You'll be working in teams of four. I will volunteer one of you, who will volunteer the next person, who will volunteer the next, who will volunteer the last. Got it?" the silent mutants blinked. "Cajun." He turned his head to Remy "You're up."

_Not me_, Rogue squished her eyes shut, _Please not me._

"You know it's you chèrie. Don't look so excited."

_Why?_

She slunked up next to the Cajun.

"Kitty." She said before she'd even turned to face the line.

The brunette stomped up to her teammates. _Dang it. Now what?_ She looked over the _awesome_ candidates. Her eyes avoided Lance, like she avoided the urge to pick him- she so could not team up with him after he called her not worth it. But maybe…

No. Not even going there. Rogue would totally kill her.

Eyes dulling by the second, she stood there.

"Peeeeeete," Gambit said through the side of his mouth. Kitty crinkled her well shaped brows. "Peeeeeete." He hissed again.

Duh. That should have been a no-brainer.

"Anytime half pint, cause, ya know, I just have all summer TO SIT HERE AND WAIT FOR YOUR DECISION!"

"Pete!" Kitty said through a tiny smile. The silvery flecks in his blue eyes lit as he came forward. Lance jutted his chin out just slightly- he crossed his arms over his chest like a girl too.

"Well," Logan paced again. Wasn't he tired yet? No. The answer is never- nature-man/beasts never get tired of pacing like sinister authority figures. "Now that you've graced us with your verdict, things can get interesting." Rogue could have sworn his Flock of Seagulls hair looked like horns. "Being honest I can't say many of you are genuinely winners- but we can try. You'll be facing off with another group." He scanned the throng of kids, "Earthquake."

"Avalanche." Lance corrected as he pushed to the front.

"Whatever!"

_This could _not_ get any worse_, Kitty smacked her palm to her forehead.

"Toad," Lance called. (I know what you're thinking: Why Toad? Really? Perhaps it was pity- if he did not take the social reject, who would?)

But Toad did something…strange. But he was Toad, so if you were expecting something normal, you're kind of stupid.

"Scott," he said, snickering.

"What?" Said Scott, in usual maudlin fashion.

"No rule against it," Logan chuckled.

"Fumbling fiends!" (yes, he made that alliteration like some cheesy over-done superhero.) "This is an outrage!" He pouted as he joined the foes. "Jean." Yeah. Like no one saw that coming.

Jean gave Logan a sharp glare; she sent a telepathic threat. Could you blame her? It was Toad. Toad!

"Wrong answer!" Logan said "Drake! You're up!"

Scott's mouth made an "O" shape as Remy let out a strained chuckle.

"Everybody to the starting line!"

**A/N: Any ideas for cool danger course obstacles are welcome. Please share . **


	5. Danger Course

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution.**

Remy, now sort of the team's unofficial cocky leader, mocked Scott's eager lunge. _Even his "ready position" looks goofy_. He winked at Rogue, then grinned. An obnoxious gleam in his eyes.

"Now", he looked over at their opponents. "We already know we got dis in da bag", he chuckled. "But dat don't mean we don't try our best".

"WIN!" Scott said. "NO exceptions".

_Oh great. Power struggle in the making. _Kitty sat up on the line while Lance tried to nudge Scott out of the head spot.

A light, warm breeze fluttered through Kitty's hair. Rogue, hair up, eyes focused ahead cracked her gloved fingers. And then Piotr- he stood relaxed, cool as mint chip ice cream.

"Rules:" Logan started abruptly (duh- its Logan what about him is subtle? That's right- nothing the man is a beast). The murmurs silenced and the crowds hushed. "There are no rules- except don't kill or injure each other- we've been over the whole lawsuit thing. Winners relax, losers do conditioning. Got it?" They nodded. "On your marks. Get set. GO!"

First obstacle: tires. Simple enough. They lifted their knees as they wove in and out of the once black (now coated in reddish brown) tires- except Kitty, who intended to phase herself through more than half of the course.

Meanwhile team argumentative dimwits crashed into each other as they fought over who should go first. Remy took a moment to snicker: golden moments like these needed to be mentally treasured.

Pin drops of sweat collected on the back of Rogue's neck. _Geez. Does it ever cool down around here?_ She jumped, following Remy, up the rope wall. The yellow brown fibers felt like they might disintegrate in her gloved palms. Then Pete, who pulled Kitty up from the bottom of the rope.

Team ADW (argumentative dimwits) caught up. As Scott launched himself at the decaying rope, a pinkish explosion burst in his face, dropping him five feet back to the ground. Remy snickered- he was just having all kinds of golden moments today.

Now for the mud crawl. They switched up the order: Rogue, then Pete, then Kitty, and Remy saved himself for last. This was the portion of the course where the teams shared an obstacle. No way was he passing that opportunity up .

As anticipated, Scott jumped in the dirt under the muddy black net behind Gambit. Gambit smiled wickedly before he could finish the action; it brought him joy to be the cause of Scott's suffering.

As Scott snarled like a pig behind him, trying to catch up, Remy planted a lightly charged card discreetly in the slick brown earth. When Scott crawled over the patch of gooey dirt, hot mud burst in his face.

"One more time LeBeau!' Scott used his fingers like windshield wipers to rub the soil from his cheesy red glasses. "One more time!"

"Remy would love to see dat". He snorted as he stood and continued at a dead sprint. As they raced forward he whispered to Kitty (another one of his cruel plans to make things difficult). She nodded. They approached the final obstacle: the rock wall/ zip line. (No, not much of a danger course. But Wolvie lacked planning skills. He would likely add other random opportunities for suffering as the summer progressed).

Kitty and Piotr placed themselves on the reverse side of the wall. Pete stayed on the ground as look out, and Kitty progressed up the reverse side of the wall. _Is this cheating? _She bit her lip. _I guess it really doesn't matter._

Rogue eased up the misshapen cement stones. She placed her hand in a round brick colored rock, and lifted her foot to a triangle sage colored rock. She looked over her right shoulder. _Plenty of time._ Toad had managed to tangle himself in the net that sheltered the mud pit.

"Let's get a move on people!" Logan yelled from the bottom of the zip line through a teal and off- white bullhorn. "This isn't a stroll!"

Rogue heaved herself at the bottom of the platform. Remy, as nimble as an acrobat, hopped easily to the top. He pretended to tip an imaginary hat to her but she rolled her eyes.

"Is now the time Cajun?" She put her hands in her knees.

"It's always da time Cherie." He smiled flashing his perfectly white teeth.

She rolled her eyes. Remy nodded at Pete as team ADW approached. Lance hurled himself at the wall. "To the left Katya", Pete rattled off his position and Kitty phased Lance halfway through the wall. "Fumbling fiends!" Scott shouted in protest. "Get a new line Summers" Kitty shouted down as her and Pete hit the top. Lance's flailing backside made her giggle. "Burst me out dork!" Lance's voice was full of wrath at having to rely on Scott to help him.

Remy could not stop snickering. He was brilliant, he really was. He laughed and slid down the black rope, handlebars in his grasp. The rest of the team came up behind. The finish line lay at the end of a 100 yard wind sprint. Home free. Easy kill.

But team ADW were persistent little suckers (they probably had Scott's annoying gung-ho attitude to blame for that). They already sprang to the top and were flying down the zip line.

No problem though. Gambit's team was fast. They already approached the halfway mark. There was no way-

PLUNK.

The four slipped on a white patch of smooth ice. Remy cursed under his breath in fast hostile French as the ADWs passed them

Gambit scrambled to his feet, picking up Rogue by the shoulders. No way was he losing to those goons. NO WAY. His strides measured at least three feet each. His arms pumped like nobody's business. At the last second, when he passed Toad, the Bobby, then Lance, and he was almost even with Summers-

He realized Scott had passed the finish line a half a second ago.

He…Lost?

_How could dis happen? To those morons?_

Scott smirked. With his sweaty man tank top clinging to his not even that great of a physique- and he had the nerve to smirk. His goofy 90's glasses and yuppie haircut- and he had the nerve to smirk.

"Nice try LeBeau". He flexed casually. "Enjoy conditioning".

No. This meant blood.


	6. I HATE YOU BOBBY DRAKE!

**A/N:Do not own X-Men Evolution **

"I hate you Bobby Drake!" Kitty (in the middle of eleventh push up) seethed. "Do you hear me? I loathe you, you odious detestable little wretch!"

"Kitty stop using big words." Rogue groaned; her body hurt, she didn't need her head to hurt too. _One hour down, one more to go_.

"It's elevated diction!" Sweat and yellowy oil coated her face. _Nice, that's _so_ attractive_. "If I get a single zit tomorrow you're dead Drake! You hear me? Dead!"

"Katya," Pete said in a calm Russian accent, neither winded nor strained. "Perhaps you should calm down?"

She flopped onto her flat aching stomach and stared at him, then at the grass (a ladybug with seven spots crawled along a slender blade) then back at him.

"It might help?" He said with a sweet, honest smile.

She inhaled for a long time. He was probably right. And how could she seethe with his blue eyes all sincere and hopeful?

"Half-Pint!" Wolverine barked "Does this look like leisure time?" he squatted down next to her, "'Cause in case you've forgotten you're a LOSER! WHICH MEANS YOU HAVE TO _CONDITION_ YOURSELF TO BE A WINNER!" he stood up. Kitty propped herself back up into a push up position.

Remy's jaw clenched. A throaty growl swelled in his chest. He focused ahead, his red eyes burning toward Scott's tent. He continued his steady rhythm, up and down, up and down.

Out of the corner of her eye, Rogue watched him. _Someone doesn't like losing_. Careful not to let him see, she observed him. Just a little.

"Wind sprints!" Logan yelled "Everybody up!"

"Sometin' gotta be done 'bout dis." Remy dusted himself off.

"Agreed!" Kitty placed a flat hand on her trembling abdomen as she sat up. _I must have like, a twenty-four pack by now. Ew_.

The group of losers stood in a line. Logan placed a silver whistle in his mouth and blew. The sound assaulted the peaceful landscape.

After the sixth whistle the teens grew lethargic (except Remy, who was fueled by his anger, and Pete who was…well, Russian. Enough said. Total beast.) _Very sexy beast_, Kitty was tired, but not too tired to notice that.

"Let's go people!" Wolvie busted out the bullhorn. Tired glares floated to him. Their insolence irritated him; most things irritated him.

"If we're not puking we're not working hard enough!" He yelled so hard the bullhorn cracked.

"Ew." Kitty said. She put her head between her knees. _Gross_.

After three more laps Logan conceded and released them. Kitty's legs turned into vanilla pudding; she prepared to hit the ground, before she felt two muscular arms catch her by the armpits, the very, very sweaty armpits. Dazed, she looked up into Piotr's jewel blue eyes.

"Tired Katya?" he propped her upward, with the support of one arm, and swept a strand of sweaty brown hair from her face. She nodded pathetically.

He walked her to her tent. The pair crunched over gravel walkway- tiny, jagged stones in hues of grey, dusty red, and white. The skin on her back where his hand was fizzled. They stayed silent, but the quiet shimmered with a hint of euphoria. Jitters lingered on top of her skin- like tiny champagne colored bubbles, or like the sparkles of a hundred diamonds, or like thousands of tiny kisses- she just liked him being there.

To pull the tent door open, he let her go. The zipper ticked along the track, click click click; until her tired legs failed her and she lost balance and fell into his solid torso. Her eyes locked on his.

"Are you alright Katya?" he said without blinking.

She, wishing she wasn't so helplessly out of shape, nodded, her lips parted slightly. If this were a movie, this would totally be the part when the sweet shy mysterious new guy swept her off her feet and put Band Aids on the places where her heart was broken (in short, kiss her, and make things better).

But this was not a movie. And Lance was in the distance, glaring and shaking his head.

_Oh crap. This has the potential to end very badly_. She scrambled for an out.

"You should like, come inside," she said. "Wouldn't want you to get sun burned or anything. Ha. Ha." She grabbed a wad of his soft cotton t-shirt and basically fell inside- they toppled onto her sleeping bag. She lay on the floor; he held himself above her, arms loosely extended so his upper body was inches from hers (yes, this was still like a cheesy teen movie gone slightly awry). Without moving anything but her hand, without speaking, without breathing, she zipped the door closed.

"Katya," he said, voice inquisitive, but, casual "What is going on?" His brow furrowed, but his eyes stayed with hers and he did not move for the slight pause she took to formulate the correct answer.

"I just," she said. He sat on the floor, his legs bent, hunched with his hands folded between them. He tilted his head and just watched her. "Lance was watching and he was coming over like he was ready to make problems and I don't want him to start problems because," a little smile drew along his face "I'm babbling, aren't I?" she played with the frayed red and white Cannon label on her sleeping bag. A steady pink filled her cheeks.

"Not at all," He touched her hand, but recoiled. "I… understand." He looked down at his hands, away from her for the first time in several minutes. "And when you are ready," he tucked a hair behind her ear, "I am ready to talk. Or to listen. Or whatever you prefer."

And she was sorry for putting him in this position, sorry Lance showed up when he did, sorry she was so pathetic as to need to hide when the only thing that was going on was her being delusional. Sorry. Just sorry.

_**Meanwhile**_

Rogue lifted her face to the suns lemony rays. From a distance, on a different bench, where Remy sat, she looked like a painting- too pretty to be fully tangible.

He shuffled a brand new deck of cards, layered them on the table. He caught her glance at him.

"What do you want Swamp-Rat?" her face shifted from casual and soft to mildly tempestuous.

"Come over her chère," he put a card down. She cocked an eyebrow. Before she stood, she hesitated. "Come on," he said when she was half way there. She took short, careful steps, a skeptical look on her face.

"Why?" she paused, inches from his table.

"'Cause," he looked down at the tidy, cascading rows of cards "No one likes to play solitaire all the time chère." He picked up the two of hearts and handed it to her. "Just reminds you you're alone." He smiled somberly.

The wistful sadness behind his ruby eyes skimmed across her heart. She looked at the powdery dust floor, afraid he'd see her understanding him.

He analyzed her face: the slope of her nose, the hint of scarlet in her cheeks, the soft rosy peachy color of her full lips.

"So what do you say?" He scooped up the alternating columns of red and black cards. "Play a game of Go Fish wit' Remy?"

"Go Fish?" Her smile reflected the gleam in his eyes.

"It's a classic." He shuffled and dealt the cards with the skill and efficiency of a casino dealer. "You don't like it," he waved his arm flippantly toward the forest, "Go… do sometin' else."

"Oh," she shook her head, "No," she fought back a wee smile, "Ah was just surprised."

"Remy's full of surprises." He winked.

She rolled her eyes; _Set mahself up for that_. "Ah'll bet you are."

"I am!" he said as he snatched up his set of cards. "Just gotta get to know me dats all." She shook her head. "Alright," he said "I'll make you a deal: if you win, you'll never have to talk to me ever again. If I win, you get to know me better. Deal?"

"Deal…" she said, now unsure that was what she wanted.

_**Twenty-Four Pairs Later**_

"Queen of hearts?" He raised an eyebrow. She faked a scowl and his grin rested high in his cheeks. "I believe I win."

"Ah guess you do."


	7. Bieber Fever

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution**

But Remy's mind had not fully drifted from his course of vengeful action. He had a lovely time with Rogue, and he intended to show her an equally lovely time when he took her up on their bet. But that would have to wait for when he could focus enough to make her feel as special as he made her jittery.

But for now, he was consumed. He had to defend his name. He drummed his fingers together like a maniacal genius.

He already had a plan, involving a little something he "_picked up_" on their spree the other night.

As well as the crew he picked up that night.

He snickered.

Yes. He was brilliant- and talented enough to plan romance and revenge at the same time.

_**Elsewhere**_

Kitty stirred in her light, almost awake sleep. Her eyelids fluttered; she squeezed them, then opened them.

"Pete," she grumbled, moving her head from the center of his lap and pressed against his washboard abs- his glorious washboard abs. Kitty gazed up at his smiling face. He blushed slightly, for watching her sleep.

"You were very tired, Katya." He stroked her now loose chocolate brown tresses as she buried her face in his stomach. Instant rogue blush of chagrin filled her face. The memory trickled back: not three minutes after thinking about how sorry she was did she grow all hazy and passed out against him. She willed herself smaller. She could feel a line of drool on her chin- refusing to look back at the tiny puddle of spit on the leg of his pants. _Nice. Reallll attractive_.

"You talk in your sleep." A crooked smile rose to his face.

If it was possible to get redder, she did. "What did I sayyy?" she grumbled as she finally pulled herself to a sitting position, rubbing her eyes.

"You are craving banana bread, you miss your shower," then his gaze focused, and amplified, "And you kept mumbling something about being sorry. You said 'I'm sorry' many, _many_ times."

"Did I say what for?" The inches between them itched; and she wished she hadn't woken up, that she hadn't been obligated to move because she woke up.

He shook his head. She resented the two inch gap between them- _two inches_: she would not afford herself the two inches it would take to touch him again, _and I don't know why_…

"Katya, may I…" And he started leaning forward, and she thought he might remedy the inches himself, and she nodded and let her eyes start to dim shut when-

ZZZZZZZZZP.

Remy popped his head into the tent and they both shot back to their original distance. Yellowy outside light burned her eyes. "Uh," he looked around awkwardly "Pardonnez-moi, but" his eyes shifted between the two of them (_yeahhh, I just killed their moment… oh well. Too late to fix it now_) "Remy's got a plan," a devilish grin spread over his handsome features and Kitty remembered the tragic loss and the obscene conditioning that put her there in the first place; a grin spread over her face to match his. She almost cackled sadistically too, until-

"I do not know that this is a good idea," Pete, the voice of maturity, said quietly.

"Come on Petie!" Remy, the anti-voice-of-maturity urged. He rushed over to Kitty and grabbed her shoulders. "It'd make da chaton feel betterrrr."

Pete analyzed the both of them. He sighed "Alright."

"Dat a boy Petie!" Remy's insane asylum worthy smile expanded. "Now, here's what we're gonna do…"

_**Later**_

"Aye dere chère." Remy swaggered into step with Rogue. "Where you headin'?"

"Ah don't know," she said, focused straight ahead. "Just somewhere it's quiet." She slid an angry glance where Bobby and Jubilee played with a scuffed, neon pink Frisbee. She pictured herself bending the stupid toy in half and beating them over the head with it. "What do you want?" She smoothed her frayed white bangs to the side.

"You busy tonight?"

"Yeah, 'cause there's so much to do around here." She chuckled. Ah, the joy of sarcasm. "Unless you were planning on making good on your bet." Now that she was removed from the situation, she didn't know if making that bet was a good idea- he was sooo… Remy.

A hot orange sun floated inches above a level horizon. Pink, purple, and peach clouds lingered in its warmth. Dark blue blended into tangerine, as a fading day fought off a persistent night; the struggle, the night subduing the day, was a gorgeous loss: she wondered what it would be like to taste the sun right now, to taste a sunset.

But while she watched the sunset, he watched her. He tried to get a grip but he couldn't; he didn't know if he wanted to- _dere's sometin' 'bout dat belle femme_.

"Non Cherie," he said after a moment of just staring at her. "Not tonight."

She turned her head to face him. She studied his face- handsome, with chiseled features and crimson stare. Nice smile too. He drew her toward him- and she couldn't decide to love or hate that.

"Alright," she half squinted "What did you have in mind Swamp-Rat?"

"A plan to earn back da dignity we, misplaced, when we lost to da dumb," he leaned his head toward a bickering Toad and Lance, then Bobby. "And da blind." His head rolled to where Scott followed Jean's every motion like a creepy stalker.

"Revenge?" She cocked an eyebrow. "Sounds like trouble." She said; her pace quickened. "I'm not getting on Logan's bad side so you and Kitty can get your petty revenge."

"It's not petty!" he said "It will be fun!" He looked back and forth "Its Cyclopes Rogue!" he whisper hissed. "You can't tell Remy you never thought about it."

"Thought about?"

"'Bout messing wit' da over achiever."

She paused. It was easy to think about it- who didn't want to torture Scott? He was so… Scott. And that was annoying. He set himself up for it. Then there was getting back at Lance- for all the nights Kitty sulked and sobbed and sired in her rage from the inside out to the point she screamed at anyone within her range (Rogue often happened to be in that range). Rogue loved her unlikely best friend- but come on: Lance made drama/misery.

So, despite the itty bitty noise telling her "No! Don't!", she nodded "Okay Cajun. This better be good."

_**5:45 am**_

"How do you know he's going to need to go?" Rogue whispered.

"Just trust Remy," he said, poking his head from the side of the cabin. "I know dese tings. He's a creature of habit."

"But how do you know his _bathroom_ habits?" She hissed, her voice panic twinged.

"It was part of my- _previous profession_- to know. You become, observant."

So when Logan creeped out the door, locking it behind him, (like the paranoid wacko he was) Remy gave her an I-told-you-so glance and led them to the door. He nodded at Pete, who waited on the side of the bathroom to make sure Logan took… a little longer than usual.

Kitty phased Remy through the locked door. (Okay, seriously? What good does locking a door do when you're surrounded by kids who have super powers that could knock it off its hinges? Whatever.) She went back outside on lookout duty with Rogue.

Gambit swaggered through Logan's cabin. He spotted varied items of interest: a sleek flat screen, a cluster of old Kenny Loggins records, a framed yellowed map of Canada, and a collection of stuffed panda bears he didn't even want to know about.

Then, he found it- an old microphone that looked like it had been pulled off the set of Shawshank Redemption, and next to a CD player too. Golden.

_**Meanwhile**_

Pete leaned against the wood paneling. Why was he doing this? Well, he knew why, but perhaps he should get her attention another way- there were many ways to woo a girl: flowers, chocolates, hand written notes. But he could not have helped it, the idea made her so joyful.

So, as Wolverine tugged on the smudgy, rust spotted door knob, he pushed back.

"Logan," Pete coughed, "I was wondering if I could" (cough) "ask you about something." His eyes shifted from the dingy tiles, to the flickering lights, and everywhere in between, to the left and right.

"You kidding me tin man?" Logan mumbled.

"It is," (cough) "Important." Pete said, never looking at Wolverine.

"Can we take it outside then?"

"Uh, nooo." Pete blocked the door before slamming it shut. "It is a sensitive issue." How did he get stuck being the distraction again?

_**Back with Remy**_

He flicked the switch at the bottom of the mike; he tapped the silvery mesh of the mouthpiece. The speakers croaked and scratched.

"Bonjour campers," He chuckled- he had always wanted to experiment in radio, but he didn't have the face for it (wink wink. How could you waste all that handsome?). "We're incredibly sorry our dear fuzzy Wolvie could not join us this morning," he chuckled again (getting away with the nick-name tickled him). "Instead, we decided to wake you up with one of our good friend Scotty's favorites. Scott, non, Scotty's whole team, guys, dis ones for you."

By now, the mutants migrated from their vinyl coverings to stare at the speakers. Kitty giggled into her palms. A smile sneaked up Rogue's face.

Remy hit the silver button with the sideways triangle: play. He grinned deviously to himself.

Cruel snickering picked up outside. When they reached the chorus it was virtually uncontrollable.

"_Baby, baby, baby ohhhh_

_I thought you'd always be mine"_

Remy clutched his side in laughter.

Outside, a handful of delirious girls sang along. A majority of the group laughed or begged for it to stop.

"Scotty," Jean pouted "What's wrong? You love the Biebs." Scott turned a shade that would make a tomato feel pale.

"You're a dead man LaBeau! A dead man!"

Kitty pulled Remy from the cabin. Rogue shook her head, convulsing with laughter.

She had to admit, he was good.

_**Meanwhile**_

"The thing about women Pete," he placed his hand on his shoulder "They're like motorcycles: once you get them going, you're smooth- it's getting started that's a pain." Pete squinted- he wanted to understand, really, he did. "But I don't know if you can call half pint a woman. She's like the size of a strawberry. You know, I thought something was up with the two of you." He pointed his index and middle finger at both of his eyes. "Nothing gets past me. Nothing." He paused; his ear turned up "Is that a chipmunk? Or do I hear Bieber?" Fury brushed through his vocal cords.

"I do not here anything sir," Pete stayed in front of the door. "Thank you," he paused "For all your- help?"

"Sure, sure," Wolverine waved his hand "I would say anytime, but we both know I wouldn't mean it- so let's just cut the crap and say good luck with your lady friend."

"Yes. Thank you sir." He moved from the door. Logan turned the handle. Pete's eyes shifted. The hinges squeaked and-

Nothing.

No music.

_No more of this_. Pete rubbed his temples.

Back at camp a giddy, smiling Kitty skipped up to him. She threw her arms around him. "Pete! That was awesome! You're the greatest!" He smiled; yes, this was worth it.

**A/N: To all my Bieber fans out there: I'm sorry if I offended you. It was just hilarious. Scott, Mr. Maturity liking the Biebs? Come on. Hilarious. **


	8. Story Time with Uncle Wolvie

**A/N: Don't own X-Men Evolution.**

One week.

An entire week without retaliation.

Victory :D

Their awesomeness totally rivaled Chuck Norris. Kitty scanned her face in the mirror (not that there was much to contemplate- how much could a girl do with a stick of eyeliner and minty lip balm?). She stroked the cocoa color along the curve of her upper lid. At the last second, she pulled up for a slight 50's style winged effect. For half a second, fear gripped her- before she decided Logan was not observant in that way and he would never notice her contraband- even if she applied mime make up, he wouldn't know. She slicked on some more mint balm; _good as it's going to get_.

Kitty handed Rogue the marble compact that came from the Bobbi Brown life-saver case. Rogue proceeded to smooth a hint of shimmer bronze shadow on her lids; it complimented the peachy color she dusted on her brow bone, and the blush she dusted on her cheeks. To avoid being overly conspicuous, she opted for clear watermelon chap-stick instead of the Bobbi gloss.

"You knowww," Kitty tapped her eyeliner on her palm "You really should consider giving up all that black emo crap you use to hide how pretty you are- that bronze color makes your eyes pop."

"Thanks?" Rogue's eyebrows made a squiggle. _Ah think there was a compliment in there somewhere_, "It's not emo crap and Ah'm not hiding anything."

"Oh I think it is. And I think you are." Kitty glared playfully. "Like from a certain someone whose name starts with an R and ends in a Y and has emmm in between." She layed on her back.

Rogue giggled- a rare occurance. "Ah'm not hiding! Especially not from that 'certain someone'," she squished her fingers in the air to make air quotes. "Now we better get outside for our big social gathering."

"It's called _fashionably late_," Kitty looked down at her outfit, noting the irony of her statement (she pulled together her most acceptable look: a ribbed black tank, hot pink Soffee shorts, and black leggings; not bad but come on- not exactly her brightest stroke of fashion brilliance. Rogue wore fitted charcoal fitted yoga pants with a plum off the shoulder top- again, not terrible but not fabulous either) "Fine let's go."

The two navigated through the dim light toward the red orange glow of the distant fire pit. They claimed the log opposite Logan, the farthest from him. Rogue ran her black gloved fingers over the grooves in the thick bark, the rough edges. She sat at the edge, by the smooth round surface where it had been sawed down. Kitty sat next to her with a six inch personal space gap to cushion them.

"Mind if Remy sit wit' you?"

"Not at all. It's totally-" Kitty moved to close the gap between her and Rogue; instead, Gambit sandwiched himself in the tiny space between them, nudging Kitty to the side. "Cool." She wiggled over. She slouched with her arms crossed. _I totally just became the third awkward person on the day to Disneyland_. She sighed. She _did_ agree to help him.

"May I- sit here Katya?" The soft spin of his words pulled her from her half annoyed daze.

Sparks splattered from the blossoming flames in the hues of orange and red, yellow and crimson, scarlet and cardinal. The fire danced over molten, blackened chunks of wood. The flavor of scorched, sappy evergreen filled their noses in a warm, earthy incense. Up and down, the flames rose and fell while a hint of daylight bled into night at the bottom of the horizon. Gentle heat prodded sweetly at their faces.

"Listen up ingrates!"

_Ah blame Kitty and her "elevated diction"._ Rogue shook her head at Kitty, who simply lifted her shoulders.

"Chuck thinks I need to have you all _bond_ more," he continued in his sarcastic green tone, "Said I have to 'nurture your creativity'" he made air quotes, "So I have organized something I hope all you slack jaws can handle," his eyes locked on Bobby. "Story time."

Even fuzzy woodland creatures silenced for that one. _Did he just say story time?_ Kitty cringed. _How unnatural. What would it be like if he had children?_ She cringed again.

A transparent din of questions thudded into the air like a dull pencil.

"What?" Bobby said, one of his stupefied looks on his face.

"Like- ghost stories yo?" Toad gulped.

"No, like fairy tales." Pietro shoved him.

"How do we choose who goes first?" Scott said "As leader, I think-"

"I got a story." Remy said, in a cool, undemanding but authoritative voice. Silence blotted out the noise. He stood. "So find someone to cuddle so you don't wet yourselves and listen." He glanced in a clockwise half circle. Kitty, not one for scary stories, (subconsciously) tilted toward Piotr. Lance's eyes narrowed and his hand curled into a fist. Kitty's shoulders caved in, and her eyes dropped to the floor; Rogue stuck her tongue out at the grossy-wanna-be-grunge. _Stupid moron, leave her alone_. Pete leaned forward to be a few inches in front of her. Remy stepped through the semi-circle. "Now," he scanned "Let us begin."

_Down deep in da south, on a slanted plain, a cotton plantation, belonging to a family of wealthy slave owners withered in the harsh beginnings of winter. It stayed in der possession for several years, until it passed to da last owner's only son._

_Da son was cunning, charming, attractive. He entertained various lady friends (though he was married to a young woman of da proper social standing), held extravagant parties, and lived a general life of ease._

_Until one of his many young lady friends (a poor farmer's daughter, of about 16) came back to his door- she came to entreat him for financial help. But his wife returned early dat day. In a crazed attempt to keep his wife ignorant, he forced da girl into his cellar. In a frantic, fearful haze, she slipped down the cellar steps, falling next to a cedar bucket of old, dirty water._

_Finding her motionless in the icy black, he dragged her, still warm, into da swamp for da gators._

_But in da midst of da murky green water, as twighlight inched closer and da gnarled trees groaned in da hissing wind, da voodoo woman- a blind, pretty Creole woman with wild white hair and a necklace of shrunken heads, rumored to be hundreds, thousands of years old, like she'd seen da day da swamp was made, like she rose up from da muddy water by her own strength- found her._

_Blond waves matted in da corrosive black earth, soft skin a cold paper white- and eyes, glowing aqua blue eyes left mercilessly open to look on da horrific face of Hades himself- da voodoo woman ran her wrinkled ebony fingers over da girl's face._

_Now da voodoo woman got ways, and she always knows. So, with sympathy for da fille, and dire compassion for her, mixed with spite for da plantation owner, she summoned up da spirits of da bayou. And, though she couldn't bring them back, she could revive da girl's spirit._

_Dat next night, under da cold December moon, at da bright party to celebrate a new accumulation of wealth, da girl manifested to take her revenge._

_When he lifted his glass of wine to make a toast, it fermented into grey dirty water like dat of da cedar bucket; the food rotted into da blackened earth from da bottom of da bayou. Da lights vanished. A faint cruel snicker rose with a pair of glowing blue eyes._

_It is said dat da girl wanders through the Deep South, seeking out the unfaithful and bringing dem dere's. But dat's just a legend. Some say if you walk around dat estate in da winter, you can see her eyes, hear her cry (if you're lucky) or hear her laugh (if you're not). But dat is just rumor. It is known, dat none of those people- not da crowd who scorned her poverty, nor da wife who was awarded da position she was not, nor da contemptuous, corrupt man who brought all dis about- left dat estate again._

"That's a load!" Pietro said after a moment of dim silence. "Your backwoods lameness wasn't even scary!"

"Oh I'll show you scary," Gambit pulled out a glowing ace of diamonds. Pietro flashed forward. He stood six inches from Remy's face.

"I'd like to see that." The brotherhood formed a line. Pete stood up next to Remy. Rogue gave Kitty the here-we-go:-the-battle-of-testosterone look.

"THAT IS ENOUGH!" Logan growled "Sit your cocky butts down!" He bore his teeth. "This is going to be a PEACEFUL EVENING OF BONDING!" His neck bulged and his breathing grew sharp. "Now, does anyone else have a _story_ they would like to tell?"

"I do!" Bobby piped up.

"Anyone _besides_ Drake got a story?" He rolled his eyes.

"I've got one." Scott said, standing to claim the spot.

"Really?" Logan looked over the teens. "No one else?" The group cowered. "Alright Scotty, you're up. Don't waste my time."

"Is it actually going to be spooky? Unlike that cowboy's lame waste of three minutes of my life?" Pietro said, a cocky smirk smeared on his face.

A sparkling magenta card burst a foot from his head. "Ahhh!" He screamed an octave higher than his normal voice. He hid behind Blob.

"It's Cajun! Not cowboy!" Gambit snapped. He stood.

"I SAID SIT DOWN!" Logan roared. The two plopped back in their seats.

"Motor mouth." Gambit muttered.

"You wanna go mush mouth?"

"I MEAN IT!" Logan demanded. "Now, Scott, would you like to start before I bring a lawsuit on myself?"

Scott soaked up the pause. "It's not all that scary- unless you're afraid of clowns."

"Clowns?" Remy and Kitty twitched at the same time. Remy cringed at the memory: Mardi Gras, he was five, just a little pick pocketing until wah-bam: surrounded by big ugly clowns. It was traumatizing for a child!

And Kitty- when she was four she got lost at the circus. A clown with a balloon sword (that totally looked real to a four-year-old!) came at her and well… screaming, crying, _traumatized_.

"Is that a problem?" Scott sneered.

"No." They both twitched.

"Alright," Scott pushed his glasses up, "Let us begin:"

"_Well, here we are." The darkness fled from the yellow beam of light that floated from Aiden's jumbo Craftsmen flashlight. He squeezed the grooves in the mustard handle. _

"_Ready to back out yet?" Autumn's hand clutched the waxy red handle of her flashlight. She swept her chocolate bangs to the side. Her sea foam eyes flashed in the darkness. This was a stupid idea. Me and my big mouth…_

_The Sea Side, a permanent carnival on a pier in Huntington, closed down five years ago. The forsaken ground wailed with a decrepit sadness of abandonment. Autumn shuddered in the darkness. A nervous chuckle slipped through her rogue lips. How did I get brave enough to make this bet? Her ego dripped through the cracks and panic filled the void. She hugged her arms around her slender waist._

_They stared at the rot iron gate; Aiden strolled through it. He wandered up to the dusty carousel and sat on a cream horse with a gold mane and a cluster of ornate blue stars on its hip. He tapped the backside of the horse in front of his, a pink pony with silver flowers and a bronze mane. The base turn table squeaked with the strain of holding weight for the first time in years._

"_We're just here till midnight right?" Autumn jiggled in her seat._

"_Yeah," Aiden smirked, "Why? Nervous?" _

"_Not even!" she pushed him. The clock from the local church sounded. Ten o'clock. Two more hours. "Uhhh. Aiden?" her voice dropped. _

"_Yeah?" he stuffed his free hand in his pocket and scanned the area around him: dilapidated Ferris wheel, open booths with candy striped overhangs, a churro machine with broken glass windows. _

"_Who's that?_

"_Who?"_

"_The really pale fat guy with the black top hat?"_

"_Ahhh, my dear lady," he drawled in a thick southern accent, "Ah am Briar Gains. I used to own this place." A smile spread over his face, revealing his stained gappy teeth. He smelled of tobacco and cotton candy. "You two know you are trespassin on this here fahne establishment?" he cocked a brow. "Not that Ah mind. But Ah think it's only fair to warn you," He paused, the dark rims around his flat eyes narrowed, "Yall oughta beware of the clown." He slid a pudgy hand into his cardinal coat pocket and slid into the mist._

_Autumn's eyes widened in panic. She shook her head. "Aiden maybe we should really go home."_

"_He was just a loon. We're fahn" he mocked the chubby man's twang. He walked her over to a red bench. They sat in the uncomfortable quiet. _

_Great. Here comes another one. Aiden stood. The church rang its bells. Eleven o'clock. _

_A girl with short platinum hair and pink streaks swayed forward. She wore silver satin ballerina shoes and a white leotard with rhinestones and silver flowers stretching up the side. A white tool tutu hung on her tiny hips. She smiled, a show of her sharp white teeth. She laughed, a tinkering of bells. "Hello," her velvet voice glided over the silence. She twirled a lacey umbrella in her tiny hand. She was as pale as a newly opened gardenia. She pursed her crimson lips and blinked her dull grey eyes. She looked like a doll, both beautiful and lifeless. The girl shifted closer. She reached out with two wee fingers (she was little bigger than a child), and touched his face. Her skin sucked the heat from his cheek. It creped Aiden out, but, mesmerized by her beauty he couldn't look away. "It will be a shame to lose you." She paused. Her dull eyes bore into him, "The time draws near. Heed the warning: beware the clown." She tip toed into the darkness, giggling. _

"_Now who's freaked out?" Autumn folded her arms._

_Aiden shook his head. "We're fine. If we stay by the exit we're golden."_

_The carnival burnt in a silent fury. Autumn checked over the grounds, back and forth, back and forth. One more hour. One more hour. _

"_Do you here that?" she hissed._

"_What?"_

"_That music!" A faint tinkering of carnival music chimed in the distance. The clock banged out one last ring. Midnight._

_The squeak of red shoes creaked over the ancient wood of the pier. A distant image morphed into a clear picture of a huge jumpsuit (half stripes, half polka dots). A synthetic, bushy, cherry wig led by a round foam nose parted the fog. He approached. _

"_.He'scomingoverhere!" she spat the phrase out as one word. Her breathing grew shallow. "Theclownasin 'bewaretheclown'!"_

"_Did they tell you to beware the clown?" he called, still coming closer. He snickered. His powdered skin made the dark rims of his eyes darker. His exaggerated red lips parted in a grin. "Ya scared yet?" he cackled. _

_Without a word the pair sprinted out of the gate. They raced to Aiden's champagne colored Silverado. The doors slammed. "BAD IDEA!" he yelled, "BAD IDEA!" He rammed the key into the ignition. He floored it all the way home. He stayed with her all night. _

_The next day, The Daily ran an article about how the abandoned carnival went up in flames. Officers believed it was arson. The only evidence they found was a red clown nose._

Remy's eyes shifted over the camp like he suffered from acute paranoia and Kitty continued to flinch. From within the distance shadows of the faded woods, a figure lurked, until it loomed over them. Their eyes swiveled up to curly crimson hair, chalky white skin, and a red nose.

Remy made like a bread cart and hauled buns into the forest. Kitty squeezed into fetal position, screaming like a soprano opera singer.

The clown (AKA the redheaded witch Jean) pulled the nose off and cracked up. Scott cackled. Lance did too- until he saw one of Pete's consoling arms around her.

"Hands off my girlfriend Bucket Head!"

"1) Did you really just say bucket head?" Rogue put a hand on her hip. "2) She's not your girlfriend."

"No one asked you!" Lance lifted his hand like he was ready to make some cheesy rock pun, until Pete's silver hand grabbed his wrist. Their eyes narrowed.

"SIT! DOWN!" Logan's voice echoed. Every head turned to face him. "YOU BEST KNOW I MEAN BUSINESS!" They inched back to their seats. Remy, realizing it was a cruel joke, sucked the charge from a lit card. "I think that was enough for one night. Go to your tents. NOW!"

_**Later**_

"I bet he's totally just guffawing about it. Like his juvenilia humor is just freaking great." Kitty ranted.

Remy poked his head in.

"Retribution will be swift!" He vanished.


	9. Mess with the Bull

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution. All that good stuff.**

_Why am Ah doing this?_ Rogue pulled her hand from Jean's drooling face. Before, she was sleeping; now, she bordered on comatose. _And why does princess get a tent all to herself?_

She knew why- at least for the "Why am Ah doing this?" portion- she just didn't want to admit that that arrogant, ridiculous Swamp Rat had a way of sucking her into his escapades. She waddled gingerly to where her unconventional team waited for her. _This "plan" sucks. Everyone else is just here for moral support._

"Ah don't know guys," the skeptical Goth whispered.

Kitty's eyes widened and she stamped her foot in the loose dirt. Okay, so she was kind of being a brat, but come on: _They were total jerks! There must be revenge!_

Remy shrugged. "No pressure Chere."

_Dang him and his reverse psychology! And good looks…_

So, hesitantly, she concentrated. _This better be the last of their brilliance._

_**In the morning**_

Scott (in usual over-achiever fashion) sprang up 15 minutes before six. He felt slightly slanted.

"Stupid Lance probably made a sleep quake." He muttered. What one dreams about to cause a sleep quake he didn't want to know.

He climbed out of his tent, eyes closed, stretching. He blinked several times in the half light.

"LaBeauuuuu!" He yelled over the camp. If he foamed at the mouth, he totally would have looked like a rabid chipmunk.

Team ADW (and the rest of the Brotherhood, except Blob, because he was too heavy) arose on the comfortable shingled roof of Logan's cabin.

"When I get down from here, you better be ready! Mess with the bull! Mess with the bull!" He raved.

Remy clutched his side. He rolled back and forth on his sleeping bag. (Indeed me lovelies- our dear unlikely protagonist ROFL-ed at antagonizing the annoying foe.)

So many golden moments, such a short summer.

_**Later**_

Piotr strolled up to Rogue.

"Hey Pete," She smiled. "What's up?" She said. "Oh good gawd. Kitty and Remy didn't send you to recruit me for more of their ridiculous shenanigans did they?" Her face flattened.

"No, not at all," he chuckled. "I was actually going to refer to our first 'shenanigan'," he said shyly.

"Oh?" She wrinkled her brow.

"I… never got to finish asking you about Katya…" he sat down next to her.

"Oh!" Rogue said, finishing for him. She moved the conversation forward cautiously; no, she didn't want to be a meddler, but it wasn't meddling to point him in the right direction, right? "Kitty!" she sparked "Kay, here's my advice: pace yourself- she's kind of been through a lot- Ah mean, you'd be traumatized too if you dated someone like Lance," she took a moment to think about what she'd said. "But don't go too slow because the two of them are so off again on again." She finished with a big grin. _Keep her_ away _from those grungy arms_.

He nodded, absorbing what she had to say. "Thank you, Rogue," He returned her smile. "You're very helpful."

But Remy had already swaggered up to the pair of them.

"Non mon ami," Remy flicked his hand like he'd just touched lukewarm Jell-O. "Get in dere. Like now. Like while da girl isn't on da fruit bowl train."

"I do not know Remy," Pete had that skeptical look,

"Uh, excuse me?" Rogue snapped "I think I know her pretty well. I'm her best friend."

"I know dese things chere." Remy stated. "Trust me."

"Don't do it Pete." Rogue gave Piotr a warning stare.

"You'll lose out if you don't" Remy said.

And then the arguing started (though it was less harsh and more playful than usual). It was inevitable, really.

Pete rubbed his left temple. Those two could be the end of him.

_**Next Morning**_

"If we keep busting missions like this I'm totally going to have to get a new awesome scale," Kitty skipped to the showers, towel in hands, hair out of its usual perky ponytail. _Who's guffawing now? Huh?_

"That's great." Rogue said; she rolled her eyes. "Ah just want mah showerrrr." She touched a patch of sweaty hair- provided courtesy of Wolverine's morning drills.

"Def," Kitty said. She _did_ really miss her shower. _How much can a girl really enjoy her shower when she's _sharing _it? Whatever. _ A five minute wash was better than none at all. She shook out her loose hair.

The water was semi-warm, but that wasn't all together bad considering that it was at least 101 degrees outside. Kitty smiled at the white bottle of Paul Mitchell_- glorious_. She squeezed a half dollar size amount on her head. It squirmed about on her scalp without really lathering, but she attributed that to some weird chemical reaction from the heat.

"Kit, Ah left my shampoo in the tent. Can Ah barrow some?" Rogue said over the gush of the water. Kitty passed the bottle over the grey plastic partition. "Thanks!" She squeezed some in her auburn locks.

But Kitty started to inhale- like _really_ inhale through her nose. This was _so_ not fruity Paul Mitchell goodness.

"Kitty, Ah think something's wrong." Rogue's voice fluctuated.

Kitty pulled her hand down to her face. At the sight of a yellowy green slime, she screeched and screamed like she'd woken up in a pile of cockroaches. Even Rogue screamed. They threw their heads under the water, but the gunk refused to be exterminated.

Panicked, they slammed the water off. Wet, screaming, and traumatized they stood in the doorway. A small crowd, composed of Remy, Pete, and team ADW, gathered outside of the door. Naturally, the ADWs giggled insidiously.

"What's wrong ladies?" Remy asked, angry and concerned.

"W-w-we" Rogue trembled slightly. Saying it aloud would make it true.

"We have freaking Toad slime in our hair!" Kitty blurted out like it was something she desperately needed to get off her chest. Hot embarrassed panic tears brimmed on the edge of her blue eyes. Pete, being decent enough to avert his eyes while she only had a towel on (alas, this is where y'all sigh sweetly because it's nice to think chivalry isn't completely dead- even though it probably is), hugged her like her head was not engulfed in mucus. He glared at the snickering ADWs- controlling (at least for now) the rage that was building within him.

Remy, however, fumed more openly. He grabbed Scott by the collar of his grey man-tank. "You think it's funny to mess with girls? That's low Scotty. Real low- even for you." Under pressure, the rest of the team split. Without reasonable back-up, Scott didn't make a peep. Remy shoved him off. "Yours is on its way Summers. Prepare yourself. Sleep with your eye open."

Scott still swaggered off like he'd achieved something. "Sure LeBeau. Bring it. Bring your A game!"

"Remy always brings his A game!" Gambit called after the cocky loser. "And even if I didn't, my B game is still better than your A game."

He looked at Rogue. "You alright Cherie?" He skimmed his knuckle along her paler than usual cheek. She nodded, a little shaky.

"Come on ladies," he said "Remy's got a solution."


	10. Your Kiss is on My List

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution  
**

"Nuit d'étoiles," Remy sang, tilting his face back and forth to the rhythm of the song. "Sous tes voiles,sous ta brise et tes parfums," he continued as his fingers wriggled shampoo in Rogue's auburn hair. Was he serenading her? Not exactly, but in an odd way technically.

"What are you singing?" Rogue snapped, though she was surprised that he had a pleasant singing voice. (Sigh; is there anything he can't do?)

"It's French Cherie." He broke from the soothing melody, "Hush up and enjoy." He smirked as he squeezed more golden-clear shampoo in his hands, rubbing his palms together, and sinking his fingers back into her softly tempestuous waves. He enjoyed her presence, even if she did not show that she enjoyed his.

Pete, a bit more reserved in the flirting realm, remained quiet. Kitty blushed, mortified, as he finger combed her now clean chocolate tresses. And worse, the strawberry color in her cheeks deepened to a rich crimson, _he's_ totally _guffawing. But we'll see! We'll see who has the last maniacal cackle!_

"Katya?" Pete skimmed her temple, pulling her back to the real world.

"What," Kitty said, ramping back to reality.

"You are done," He smiled at her confused face, as she realized the water had stopped and her head was free of soap.

"Oh!" She said, head still in the sink. "Right." With the grace of a wounded seal, she propped herself up- only to slip in an invisible puddle of soapy water. Visions of lost teeth and heavy bruising, she braced for impact on the yucky squares of the bath tile- but she never hit the floor.

Pete's arm was wrapped under her tiny ribcage. "Careful," He said, slowly bringing her upright.

"Yeah. I'm like, such a klutz." She giggled self consciously "Just call me clumsy Kitty. Ha-ha. Total alliteration." _Oh my gosh Kitty. Shut up_. A soft incarnadine filled her cheeks; his warm stare stirred a subtle, hot nervousness within her.

"Iyeeeee," she stumbled for the words "I have to go- get detangler." _Yeah, before I bring anymore shame of embarrassment on myself_. She hustled out of the bathroom.

Remy made a-what's going on?-face at Rogue. She replied with an-it's none of your business!- look. He shrugged- he'd always fancied himself quite good at matchmaking.

"Don't. Do. Anything." Rogue hissed through clenched teeth. "You leave them alone."

"What?" He said with a playful wink. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I mean it Cajun!" Her eyes grew somber. "Last thing she needs is for you to get involved so her heart breaks more and…" she looked at the floor.

"We still talking 'bout da chaton?" He ran his index finger along her jaw, "Or we talking 'bout you chere?"

Their eyes caught; and for a millisecond she allowed the vulnerability.

But that was only a millisecond.

And she intended to make up for it.

"You don't know me Gambit." She shoved his hand away.

"You won't let me."

"Maybe Ah don't want you to."

"And maybe you do-" he said; they'd grown reasonably louder as their conversation progressed. "I think you do- I think you do and that scares you to death."

"What are you my psychiatrist now?" They'd inched closer to each other. "You're so _arrogant_,"

"Well you're stubborn-"

"Ah'm stubborn? Wow. You're obnoxious-"

"Closed off-"

"Conceited-"

"Hostile-"

"Self-centered player-"

"Fickle, ridiculous-"

"Then what do you want with me?" She yelled; their voices had drawn to a full crescendo. "Huh, Gambit? Isn't this just one of your stupid thieving 'Ah-just-want-what-Ah-can't-have things?" She snapped, inches from his face, "I won't be that girl, so what do you want?"

Without another word, he took her face in his hands and kissed her. She stepped back, dazed, but not altogether unpleasant- until she gathered her thoughts.

"Touch me again without my permission, and Ah'll drop you." She brushed past him.

He did a mental face palm- for once he didn't have all the right moves.

_**Meanwhile**_

Kitty hustled outside; chagrin clutched her insides.

"Hey Kitty." His voice jolted her out of her skin: Lance. _Oh dear goodness_. Piotr slowed just outside the door of the bathroom. He changed his direction, but ambled, still watchful.

Looking back at a now very sullen Pete, she ignored him.

"Kitty," he grabbed her wrist. "Come on, Kit."

She scowled. "Come to laugh in my face over your stupid prank?" She put her hands on her hips.

"Nah Kit," He said, glancing at Pete. Lance flattened his small smirk. "You know I care about you. I wanted to, ya know, check up on you." He touched her face, still looking at Pete.

She swatted his hand away. "If you really cared you wouldn't have traumatized me like that." She pushed past him.

He tugged her wrist. "I'm serious!" He pulled her reluctant form against his chest; still looking at Pete, who had slowed to the speed of a wounded snail. "It was Scott's idea and- well I miss you Kit. I'm sorry. It's just one more chance- come on."

"Oh get off Lan-"

But he pulled her face into a forced lip lock. She shoved away from him.

"Lance!" She cried. She turned to look for Pete, but the damage was done: her sweet Russian Prince Charming had seen what he had seen and walked off.

"What did you do that for?" Kitty considered slapping him across his cocky face.

"You're my girl Kit," He smirked in the direction Piotr had walked off. He squeezed her shoulders.

"No." She shook her head and shrugged away from him. "Just, stop." She hurried after Pete, desperate to fix whatever the heck just happened.

"Come on Kittay!" He yelled at her back. "You know we aren't done! We're never done!"

"Oh yes. We are. I'd say we're _pretty _done." She didn't turn to face him. She just left him there to look like the idiot he was.


	11. Queen, Princess, Whatever!

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution.**

Remy tossed his pillow up, catching it on his chest. He peered into the gray dome of a ceiling for some kind of inspiration, anything. Normally, he would ask Pete (old Petie _was_ rather philosophical) but, alas, his good friend was nowhere to be found. Pete had successfully evaded Kitty for quite some time, and was most likely of sketching some melancholy scene in the brush.

Gambit had no such creative outlet; he brooded in his slur of emotions.

Perhaps it was better this way- if they were together they might start talking about their _feelings_ and that would be very awkward.

He was kind of sorry, in that he had not meant to make her unhappy; however, he was kind of not sorry in that he had _really_ wanted to for a really long (he still couldn't get the watermelon scent of her lip balm out of his head- if anything the "incident" had only made things worse: he feared he formed an addiction he could not feed) and in that, for a second, he knew she'd liked it too.

Oh the confusion.

Did he A)say sorry, to make her happy? B) Stick to his guns and make her admit it wasn't all bad?

Normally he would have constructed option C) Drop that girl like a hot rock and move on to the next one. But this wasn't "normally"; this was Rogue.

_Sometin 'bout her_.

The zipper on the tent door scooted along its black track. Kitty Pryde flopped down next to him.

They laid there for about ten seconds before Gambit sat up, "Can I help you petite?"

She shook her head as she buried her head in her arms.

"Then may I ask why you're here Chaton?"

"Rogue is being all Rogue-ish." She pouted through her arms, "There's no room left in the tent with her anger taking up all the space."

"Oui petite," He sighed. "Remy knows. Rogue is very… she's very…"

"Violently mood swing-ish?" Kitty turned a sullen smile toward him.

"Oui," He stared down into his rough palms: thief's hands, hands that stole the perfectly imperfect kiss. "Has sheeee-"

"Said anything?" Kitty examined his confused face. "She called you a few unmentionables and, ya know the usual-" the mildly horrified look on his face prompted her to shut up and rephrase "But like, she totally wasn't like, too totally in the mood to kill you, like I totally wouldn't worry about it. Totally." _Geez I really need to work on the whole useless blabbering thing_. "Um, my advice, not that I have this awesome love life that you would need any of my advice, I would take things slow. This is not her comfy place."

"Comfy place?" His brows crinkled.

"Comfy place!" She said emphatically. "She thinks you're shady!"

"Shady?" He raised offended eyebrows.

"Shady!" She rolled her eyes. "You're records not so great." She rolled her eyes. "So you're going to have to A) Woo her. B) Sincerely really genuinely for real _want_ to woo her- her and only her." She kept her eyes wide and nodded fervently to make sure he was getting all this.

"I do!" He pouted. He glanced at Kitty "Thanks Chaton. Anything Remy can do for you?"

"I-" she looked at Pete's sleeping bag, scratching her fingernail on the poly-fiber material.

"Pete?"

"Yes."

"Trust me petite. You just gotta talk to him." She gave him a puzzled look. "Petie's too polite to stop listening to _anyone_, especially you."

"Thanks Remy. You _really_ know how to make a girl feel special." She rolled her eyes.

"You know what I mean! He probably has a bunch of sonnets and all that nonsense," he flippantly waved his hand.

"Maybe you should try writing some 'sonnets and all that nonsense'." She shoved him; he lost balance and fell on his side.

"Maybe I do!" He recovered.

"Yeahhh." She chuckled at the mental image of him scribbling with a peacock quill, trying to write in iambic pentameter.

Moments of silence passed before things were officially labeled awkward.

"All dat is gold does not glitter,  
Not all dose who wander are lost;  
Da old dat is strong does not wither,  
Deep roots are not reached by da frost.  
From da ashes a fire shall be woken,  
A light from da shadows shall spring;  
Renewed shall be blade dat was broken,  
Da crownless again shall be king." He whispered in an uncharacteristically rhythmic tone.

"You LOTR it?" Kitty asked with a wrinkled brow.

"It's a beautiful story petite. Hush." He said "Apparently you do too."

"Touché." Her cocky grin fell. "But what does that have to do with anything?"

"Da crownless again shall be king," he smirked "You ready to be kings-er- you'd be a queen-er-"

"I prefer princess. Aren't you like the prince of your Thieves Guild thingy?"

"Whatever!" He rolled his eyes. "And yes I am, but that is a story fo' another day. Point is we're going to plan da ultimate prank. You in chaton?"

"I'm so down!"

_**Meanwhile**_

Rogue, plagued by her confusion, ran her fingers through her hair- the hair he'd so carefully washed.

The pros and cons swayed in her mind.

She _had_ let him believe they were sort of- in an unconventional way- kind of almost friends- sort of (she had been all nice-ish to him lately). But he invaded her personal space! And where did he get off psycho analyzing her like some weird southern voodoo therapist?

As for the kiss? She didn't even want to think about it; thinking about it might make her consider it, might make her think it was okay, maybe even…

No! It was not okay! This was why thinking was bad!

"Swamp Rat," she mumbled like a cranky old person after yelling at some kid to get off her lawn. _Give him an inch and suddenly he thinks it's okay to make out while you're in the middle of a raging argument._

But the kiss was not the only thing to be ignored. The looming possibility, the insidious potential- he was right: she was afraid to let him too close.

_Dang it! _She folded her arms and scowled. _There Ah go thinking again! _She fell back against her pillow. _This is all his fault!_

But maybe a little hers.

**A/N: Okay, obviously I don't own the poem either. Please review=). And if you have any "elevated diction" or degrading insults for Kitty or Logan that you would really like to see- suggestions are welcome :) Thanks!**


	12. Happy Happy Panda

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution**

So what if they were just throwing vodka on the never ending "I loathe you" flames between them and ADW? Kitty sneaked back into the tent.

This ultimate prank (with a big fat W next to their team- were they still a team?), remained morally questionable, in that it would be hilarious, but if/when its cycle was through, someone could (most likely _would_) be in trouble up to their chins.

She hoped that someone was Lance.

Jerk.

She untangled the Jedi braid she fastened at the bottom of her ear- a token she hoped would bring her luck, skill, and the power of _The Force_ (plus it totally upped her awesome level).

She sighed, louder than she meant to.

"Talk to him," Rogue mumbled.

"Shouldn't you be asleep?"

"Goth," she whispered. "Creatures of the darkness?"

Kitty rolled her eyes. "No wonder you're so cantankerous all the time." She half chuckled.

Now Rogue rolled her eyes. "Stop with the 'elevated diction'. I can't handle Logan using anymore words that don't belong in his vocabulary."

They snickered together. Kitty sighed, less exasperate, more content this time. (This was why they were sisters from different misters- they just understood each other).

"Kitty,"

"Yes, Rogue,"

"Why is that strand of hair all curly, like you were wearing a Jedi braid?"

_**Meanwhile**_

"When will we see the repercussions of your handy work?" Pete, polite and patient, waited up for Remy.

"In 'bout five hours." Remy said. Unlike Kitty, he had informed his roommate _prior_ to waltzing in at one in the morning.

"Is she alright?" Pete asked, slowly.

Remy nodded, choosing not to meddle in spite of himself.

Pete nodded back.

Short, simple, to the point.

_**Five Hours Later (right after Logan's morning potty break)**_

"I BETTER SEE ALL YOU BOTTOM FEEDERS IN LINE IN THE NEXT FIVE SECONDS OR YOU'RE ALL GOING TO WISH NEVER CAME TO CAMP MUTANT!"

_Ah'm pretty sure everyone already feels that way._ Rogue stretched.

"I DON'T HEAR HUSTLING!"

Oh no. A sudden herd of mutant teen sprinted to the morning line up before Wolverine had a brain aneurism. Logan raged.

Kitty searched down the line o students- to the left was Bobby (a little too close for her liking), then Scott, Pietro, Toad, Blob, and on the end, Lance; to the right- Rogue, Jubilee, Rahni, Amara, Gambit, and she stopped when she came to Pete. She leaned so far forward she almost tipped over- her not so subtle attempt to will his attention to her. He turned his face, but only made eye contact for a second before looking at the grayish gravelly dirt. Gambit shot her a help?- please? look. She replied with a what-do-you-want-me-to-do-about-it? face. Another please? face.

Rogue sensed what was going on- she wasn't stupid (or blind- they were as subtle as a pair of purple polar bears)- she just refused to look that way; her cold stare stayed fixed forward.

"It wouldn't hurt to just talk to him," Kitty whispered "Like, so he at least knows what's wrong."

"He knows," she looked at the raging Wolverine.

"SILENCE!" Logan boomed. Silence. He squinted against the terrified bunch. "I WANNA KNOW WHO DID IT, AND I WANNA KNOW NOW!"

"Did what?" Bobby would be stupid enough to ask.

"YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE!" he said "WHERE ARE THEY?"

"Who?" Kitty did her best I-have-no-idea-what's-going-on voice.

"WHO?" Logan roared "Lulu? Mr. Julips? Sugar Pie?" Blank stares surrounded the fuming man/beast. Had this been a different time, and a less pissed Logan, it would probably be funny to hear him utter those words. "MY MINT CONDITION, SPECIAL EDITION, FIRST CLASS HAPPY HAPPY PANDA COLLECTION!"

(Crickets in the background)

"Fine, we'll do this the hard way."

"Wait," Bobby (again, stupid, _stupid_ Bobby) said. "What's 'Happy Happy Panda'?" Stupid, _stupid _Bobby. Couldn't just let it go.

"WHAT IS HAPPY HAPPY PANDA?" Logan came centimeters from Bobby's face. "You know snowball, I'm going to let this go- because I know your standings in life will never improve, and frankly, I pity you." He began to pace. "Happy Happy Panda was an original Canadian animai series, for ages eight and up- it lit my life in a very, very dark time in my life." He discretely wiped a tear. "SO IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU YOU'LL RECOVER THOSE BEARS!" Realizing what he divulged, he added "They're collector's items. Very expensive- worth a fortune." He paused. "Where was I? Oh, right, WE'RE GONNA DO THIS THE HARD WAY!"

Scott twitched. "Hard way?" he turned to Jean. "Pandas?"

_**Flashback: Six Minutes Ago**_

"I BETTER SEE ALL YOU BOTTOM FEEDERS IN LINE IN THE NEXT FIVE SECONDS OR YOU'RE ALL GOING TO WISH NEVER CAME TO CAMP MUTANT!"

Scott sprang up in usual early bird fashion. On his way out, he tripped on a fuzzy, black and white stuffed animal.

"Panda?" He muttered to himself. "That's weird."

_**Present**_

"I've been framed!" Scott shrieked as Logan pulled the last bear from his tent- one from Bobby and Ray's (naturally, Bobby would be the one punished because, well, he was Bobby.), one in Avalanche and Toad's, and the final in Scott's.

"Tell it to Mr. Julips." Logan snarled.

On the edge of Scott's line of sight, Kitty and Gambit slid their palms together and pumped fists.

"Dastardly deeds!" Scott pointed at the Cajun and perky brunette. "It was them! They set me up!"

"One more alliteration one-eye and I'll deck you!" Wolverine examined the bear. "You all are on mess hall duty! And you have six hours of conditioning to be completed under my surveillance, and Chuck will be hearing about this."

Scott's lip quivered- his record, _tarnished_? "This isn't the end LeBeau! Mark my words! You have not heard the last of me!" He raved like he just escaped from the loony bin.

"It's okay Kit," Lance strolled up. "I forgive you," he kicked a rock out from under him. "I'd retaliate too, if I threw myself at my ex and got rejected like that." He put a bent, half gloved knuckle under her chin, "But please, don't be so pathetic." He made a kissy sound, pivoting toward his group.

Kitty launched forward, ready to claw his eyes out. Rogue's arms bear hugged her, holding her back.

"You rude, pompous, putrid jerk!" She screamed, pulling away from Rogue's grip. "You half-witted, arrogant, imbecile! How dare you!"

"Not worth it Kitty," Rogue whispered. "Not worth it."

"Leave her alone." A calm but firm Russian voice sounded. He was totally coming to her rescue- could he be more amazing? If she wasn't so furious she would sigh.

"Who's going to make me, soda can man?" (Really? Soda can man? _Really_?)

"I'm your huckleberry." Gambit stepped forward, tipping an imaginary hat. "We're down for a brawl if you are."

Pete clenched a metal fist. Remy bridged a deck of cards. Lance opened his mouth to make some lame rock pun.

It was so on.

**A/N: Gasp! Cliff hanger! If you liked it please review! (And if you caught the little **_**Tombstone**_** reference at the end, you're officially awesome=) if not, go watch it!)**


	13. Not the Money Maker!

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution**

Rogue and Kitty felt like they were in a clip from _The Outsiders_- the super intense part when the Greasers and the Soc's are getting into their rumble and Dally busts out of the hospital; yeah, that part.

"It's on pinky!" Pietro ran forward to rush Remy. Remy, with his hyper awareness of kinetic energy, dodged Quicksilver and threw a glowing pink card. Pietro tripped as it burst at his feet.

"Let's rock this joint!" (yeah, just _guess_ who said that one.)

Pete morphed to his metal self.

Lance did the whole eyes-rolling-back-in-his-head thing and stomped his foot. The floor beneath them rolled. Pete steadied himself along the shaking earth- and then he close lined captain fruit bowl. Lance hit the deck like a bag of cement. Kitty gasped. Meanwhile Remy threw a fistful of cards at Pietro, who was trying to make himself a human vortex, and stiff armed Toad- it was one of those scenes that would amplify in awesomeness if it was in slow motion. Blob thundered toward Gambit; he braced himself to be squished; until he saw Rogue. She grabbed the fatty pudge on the back of Blob's neck. _Why am Ah doing this?_ If Lance fell like a bag of cement, then Blob fell like a sedated elephant.

"Thanks chère,"

"Save it," Rogue snapped_- like Ah'd really let him get killed_ that _way_.

"Chère-" He said, spouting out cards at an untouchable Pietro. "I'm sorry about-"

"Ah said save it." She teamed up with Kitty to wrangle Toad. Ew. "Ah can work with you. It doesn't mean Ah have to like you."

"Fair enough."

Kitty chased after Toad- eager to get back at him for the grotesque slime debacle- with Rogue like they were a pair of hog wranglers. Kitty glanced back at Pete and Lance.

Lance coughed and wheezed.

Pete kneeled to his level. "Listen," he said, lifting Lance by the color. "I am not going to hurt you- because in spite of every cruel, rotten thing you have done to her, it would upset Kitty to know you are hurt," He paused, making direct eye contact. "But make no mistake: if you do _anything_ to damage her, in any way, shape or form, I will deal with you." He totally could have passed for a Russian mobster if he wasn't such a natural sweetheart.

"FREEZE!" Logan commanded, finally taking his attention from the stuffed panda. Bobby (stupid, _stupid_ Bobby) turned into ice. Logan pinched the bridge of his nose. What does one say to that? He contained the insults brewing inside him. "If you imbeciles don't cut the crap right now I'll do it for you!" His claws sliced through his knuckles. "I swear. I can't believe Chuck left me alone with you boobs. I don't get paid enough for this."

The silence settled and the teens were dumbfounded. Pietro, splayed out on the ground, courtesy of Gambit's faithful black Jack, seized opportunity- he spit at Remy's boot.

Aw heck no.

Those were fighting terms. Just plain disrespect was what that was.

So they were on the ground- punching, kicking, socking- Pietro even resorted to hair pulling at a very low point. Remy delivered a left hook, leaving the seed of a dark purple shiner on Pietro's right eye.

"Not the money maker!"

"If dat's your money maker you must be in da poor house," Remy grunted.

"I said ENOUGH!" Logan grabbed Remy by the back of his collar and threw him aside. Remy spit watery blood on the hot dry earth, running his tongue along a gash in his cheek. Pietro rubbed a knot forming on his forehead. "Since you all can't seem to get along, we can just _work_ the disobedience out of you," Logan looked back and forth. "LeBeau, Half Pint, Rogue, Tin Man, you'll join our little band of thieves in kitchen duty. Toad, Motor Mouth, Blob-" (say what you want about Logan, but he was smart enough to keep Toad away from the food) "The cabin needs a coat of paint."

Rogue glared at Remy.

_What?_ He mouthed at her.

"Dismissed." Logan barked.

"_This_? Is totally your fault." She hissed, strutting off.

"Is what?" He asked as he speed walked half a step after her.

"You heard me. This is _your_ fault. _You_ started this."

"Non," He said defensively "I seem to recall _Pete_ stepping in to defend da chaton before I did anything."

"Spare me Gambit- you instigated."

"You didn't need to get involved chère- I never asked you to rescue me."

"Oh please." she swiveled to face him. "I was being there for Kitty, not you."

"Whatever you say Rogue." He dug his heels in the dirt.

"Whatever. Think what you want. I don't care." She stomped in the opposite direction.

"For what it's worth:" he called after she was about twenty feet away. She stopped. "Thanks for da rescue- and for staying on da team."

She crushed her eyes closed before she started walking again. It hurt her: that he knew what to say; and that he still had the nerve to say it.

_**Meanwhile**_

Kitty weaved through the crowd.

_Okay really? How did I lose him? He's like, freaking over six feet tall._

She groaned at her stupidity. _Look away for two seconds and poof. Gone_.

Where was that stupid picnic bench? She needed to hit her head.


	14. Bobby Drake's Wish Comes True

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution**

_This sucks_. Rogue traded her black gloves for a pair of cheap clear plastic ones.

"Do you have these in pink?" Kitty held the crinkly gloves in front of her face. Logan glared at her and growled. "Or not." She clamped her mouth shut and wiggled her hand in the smooth plastic.

"Alright low lifes," Logan paced along the line of teens. "I'm going to assign you each roles based on your 'talents' or lack thereof," his eyes went to Bobby. "Scotty and Earthquake,"

"Avalanche," Lance corrected.

"DO NOT TEST ME WITH YOUR INSOLENCE!"

Rogue rolled her eyes at Kitty. _How much time does she spend with Logan anyway?_

"As I was saying, you're on salad duty- seeing as you can't make salad worse than it already is. Half Pint, Tin Man-"

"Uh…" Kitty's mouth dropped.

"YOU REALLY WANNA PUSH THIS HALF PINT?"

Her mouth slapped shut, awkwardly keeping her eyes off Pete.

"Good," Logan continued, "Seeing as Cajun food doesn't agree with me, you'll be making the main course." (TMI) "Rogue, LeBeau, you're in charge of dessert."

Rogue opened her watermelon balmed lips to protest.

"The Wolve has spoken!" Logan said before she could speak. "You can thank me later," he whispered, nudging Pete.

_Yeah Wolvie, you really have a way with the pairings_. Rogue rolled her eyes.

"What about me?" Stupid, _stupid_ Bobby- he actually _wanted_ a task, perhaps to show he had _some_ worth.

"Oh, yes, um, Bobby," Logan pinched his nose. He scanned the room for inspiration. "You are in charge of, um, ice-cream and drinks." He pointed at Bobby. "Don't screw this up snowflake- don't mess this up." He glared over them. "Get started!"

"What are we supposed to make?" Kitty asked, her voice the size of a kidney bean.

"Use your imagination," Logan walked toward the door. "Don't make me sorry I didn't stay and babysit you- everyone's on clean up duty- so if you make a mess, that's your own problem."

The kitchen needed a serious overhaul. The cabinets were set in a groovy pallet of yellow and orange; yellowed peeling wallpaper with assorted vegetables and fruits made up the back splash. Several dingy refrigerators hummed in the back of the room. _I should totally offer to make this place over_; Kitty skimmed two fingers over the mustard counter top.

She walked with Pete in strain silence to their station. She waited around like a dummy as he preheated the oven. She drummed her fingers on the counter, _well I must look productive_.

"So…" She shifted her weight. "What are we making?" _So awkward._

He leaned his forearms on the counter. "What would you like to make?" He said, with a tiny smile at the corners of his lips.

"Well like, there are a few things I'm like, comfortable making, just cause like I guess I'm not really all that domestic, ya know, so I'm kind of like, stuck to stuff like grilled cheese and like, frozen French fries, and…" Her voice dwindled. _Babbling here! Stop me anytime!_

"Grilled cheese and French fries it is then." He said, still with a tiny smile, without the slightest of ill will; but then, Pete was like that.

"Oh, well, okay," She said.

They worked quietly next to each other; Kitty diced tomatoes while Pete blended seasonings to make their French fries super fries.

"Oh my gosh, you're like, total iron chef and I'm like, the stupid weird girl from the supermarket who needed the take home chef." She said with a simpering giggle. _Great, now I'm being annoying._

He chuckled warmly. "You are doing fine," He said, peeling potatoes so fast you would think it was a contest.

_Ugh! He's so nice! Even when he shouldn't be!_ Her chopping speed plummeted to that of an arthritic blind woman. _And cute. And sexy. And handsome._ She stopped watching the fat red tomato in her hands and stared at him in a stupefied trance.

"Ouch!" She yelped, clapping one hand over her mouth and flicking the other. She pinched her bleeding finger and bounced on her toes (yes, that would be the pain dance).

"Let me see," Pete cooed, coaxing her to lend him the damaged pointer. He held her tiny hand in his, wiping the warm crimson goo away with a paper towel. He quickly and tenderly examined it. "Just a slice," he murmured, still holding her hand. "It's not too deep,"

He was so ridiculously close! He was so close she could smell his flipping shampoo: a soft, minty smell; how could he smell good? _We're in the middle of the dirty, yucky wilderness and he smells good_. Her hand throbbed and she couldn't tell if it was him or the skin she'd so stupidly cut through. _Ugh! Why?_

"PeteI'mreallysorry." She blurted out like it was one word. "And I'm sorry that I got you in trouble and I'm sorry for being a really _really_ bad cooking partner and for not saying sorry for any of this sooner."

"It's alright Katya," He said, with a chuckle, still holding her hand; he brought her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles (inner swoon). "I understand. Do not be so hard on yourself."

The kiss warped her insides- she felt like raspberry jelly. But it was sad jelly (so it probably wasn't raspberry jelly; it was probably grape jelly). He'd accepted her apology but- now what? She blamed her imagination for jogging off into the distance, dragging her by the hand.

"Okay," She whispered as he let her hand drop. "So we're okay?"

He nodded. "We are fine."

Fine is such a plain, vague word.

_Say something stupid!_ Kitty bit her lower lip. What could she say? She tip toed off to find a Band Aid.

_**Meanwhile**_

The pretend everything is normal approach seemed best. "We got a plan chère?"

"Nope." She said, ripping a glass bowl, whisk and spoon from the groovy cabinet.

He nodded. _What would Tante do…_(imagine the Jeopardy theme song). He snapped "You ever had a beignet?"

"Nope." She said, (ironically) pulling out the sugar.

"Good. We're makin' dem. " He said, rubbing his palms.

"What?" She snapped. "You can't just arbitrarily decide that."

"Jus' trust me chèrie." He said, reaching for the flour.

"Me?" She put a hand on her hip. "Trust You?"

"Yes." He said. "You trust Remy." He leaned on the cabinet. "Gimme a chance chère. Please?"

The sincere, gentle hope in those devil red eyes faltered her. She bit her lip and shrugged. "Fahn."

They mixed in short silence.

"Please pass the sugar chèrie", he winked. She rolled her eyes and handed it to him. "See", he smiled. "We make an alright team."

"Ah guess", she said as they took ice cream scoop sized clumps of dough and plopped them in oil. Though she'd rather not admit it, he was kind of right.

He took a deep breath and swallowed the lump of pride in his throat, "I never said…I didn't…I'm..sorry". He frowned, looking up from the dough.

"Be still mah heart-Remy LeBeau apologizing", she said meeting his glance.

"Oh. Come on now chère", he nudged her.

"Ah ought to go write this down somewhere", she chuckled. If nothing else he was glad he made her laugh. She looked up at him and he smiled-no, not that stupid annoying smirk- a real smile. Her eyes flashed back to the dessert. "This better be good Cajun". She grabbed the powdered sugar and dusted it over the golden brown pastries. "Wow", she covered her mouth as she chewed. "You should take up baking-Ah can see you in like a little apron. You should call yourself Remy Crocker." She snickered. "Just in time too."

The mass of mutants filed into the mess hall. Kitty stepped forward (unofficial perky spokesperson). "Tonight we're having salad", (eyeroll), "And tomato grilled cheese sandwhiches with like, the most bomb frnch fries I've ever had", she looked back at Pete. "And beignets. If you've never had them, they're freakin legit. Or you can be boring and have ice cream. Enjoy."

The little worker bees sat at the table estranged from each other. Kitty snatched the end seat next to Rogue like a pair of half off Louboutins. They sat and ate their meal. Munching, talking , and laughing. You would think there was peace- think.

Scott and Lance swaggered up with their trays. Kitty imagined she was invisible. Remy stabbed a fork in the middle of his sandwich.

"The 90's called, they want their style back Mullet Man and Goggle Boy." Rogue swirled the fries around her plate, glancing at Scott's red sunglasses and Lance's mullet. She smiled sarcastically.

"This isn't over LeBeau", Scott said.

"Yeah", said Lance like a girly sidekick. "We know you set us up."

"I'm watching you LeBeau", (Scott did the Robert DeNiro I'm watching you thing from _Meet the Parents_) "Always watching."

Remy snickered-how does one respond to that.

Lance completed his girly sidekick act with a hair flip as they made their exit.

But Remy couldn't resist. He stuck his foot out right in front of poor Scotty boy.

Scott's tray went flying, splatting ice cream (he would go for the boring ice cream) on the back of Pietro's neck.

"Who threw that?" He stood, salad bowl in hand, and chucked it at Scott, but his aim was terrible because it hit Bobby in the fasce.

Bobby Drake had waited his entire life for this moment and it was finally hee. Armed with a fist full of fries he yelled' "FFFOOODDD FFFIIIGGGHHHTTT!"

Boom.

Like an explosion of potatoes, lettuce, cheese, and powdered sugar- the kids went wild.

Remy chucked a sandwich at Scott's face. Jubilee poured salad dressing on Amara. Kurt bamfed over Tabitha to drop orange juice on her hair and bamfed back.

"This is so not my kind of thing!" Kitty screamed as an icy scoop of vanilla and chocolate syrup hit her in the back. "Hey!" She snapped, turning to see- "I HATE YOU BOBBY DRAKE! I HATE YOUR MISERABLE GUTS!" She ducked under the table.

Rogue crawled to safety- the kitchen. But she could not escape- a slick mess of half melted strawberry ice cream hit her in the neck. "Nobody even likes strawberry!"

She stood to be hit in the side by a poof of powdered sugar. "That's it!" She grunted, picking up anything in her path, and heaving it at anyone misfortunate enough to be in her way.

Logan burst through the glass doors. "STOP!" But the chaos continued. "STOP!" No change. Poor Amara crawled to the door in an attempt to escape. "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" She shrunk back to the size of a pea and crawled away from the enraged Wolverine. "I. SAID. CEASE!" That time the cafeteria rumbled. Kids froze mid air, food in hand, about to strike. Wolverine marched up to the soda drenched aisle. "WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS?" Yeah like any moron had the nerve to answer. Even Bobby kept his mouth shut. Logan's face was the color of a turnip, and kitty was seriously concerned he was having an aneurism.

"I WANNA KNOW WHO STARTED THIS, AND I WANNA KNOW NOW!" Logan snarled. All hands went up and pointed to the kitchen duty table. "Everyone else, OUT!"

_**Clean Up Time**_

Kitty and Rogue scrubbed along the edges of the baseboard with clear green toothbrushes. Remy battered the floor with a rag. Pete Windexed salad dressing off the top window.

"I hope this has been a _learning experience_ for all of us." Logan strolled up and down the half cleaned aisles. "Have we all learned something?"

"Yes Logan", they moaned.

**A/N: Sorry to all the strawberry ice cream lovers if I have offended you. Hope you enjoyed the chapter none the less. **


	15. Last Man Standing

**A/N:Do Not Own X-Men Evolution. Story inspired by Rogueslove22 (thank you :D). **

"It has come to my attention that there is some pent up hostility among you", Logan paced the morning line up.

_What gave ya that idea? _Rogue rolled her emerald eyes. _Nothing gets past you._

"So", Logan continued, "Chuck has sent us a more 'positive outlet'." He kicked the crate behind him. He reached inside and tossed a gun at Remy.

Remy looked at the gun, aimed, and shot Scott square in the chest. It exploded in a gush of ruby red paint. Scott fell to the ground, gasping for air.

"Oops", Remy smirked.

"He shot me!" Scott gasped.

"I can see that", Logan grunted. "Now, moving on to more important matters. No powers and last man standing wins."

"Are you going to do something about it?" Scott huffed.

"What do you want me to do about it now?" Logan shrugged. Scott gaped. Logan turned to Remy and rolled his eyes. "Don't do it again", Logan said. He continued chucking paintball guns at everyone. "Follow me losers."

_**In the Battle**_

Kitty hid behind a pine tree. Her strategy: wait it out and pray not to get hit. This event was also not her thing. This was a battle of testosterone. _Hello- I'm a girl! And Logan and everyone else thinks I'm stupid- at least I'm smart enough to know pain isn't fun. Why couldn't we have a shopping tournament instead- that I could totally dominate. _

Rogue slumped behind an ever green next to Kitty. _This is juvenile._ She hugged the paintball gun to her chest. _It would be nice to shoot Scott though (or Jean, or even Bobby. It really doesn't matter)._

Remy situated himself in a tree the tree that Bobby had just so happened to be hiding behind. Remy held his hand over his mouth to quiet his laughter, _Too easy_.

Logan blew the starting whistle. Bam! Red splatter on Bobby's shoulder.

"Hey!" he yelled. "I didn't even get to play!"

"Life lesson:", Remy yelled as he leapt to the floor, "All's fair in love and paintball!"

"Are we going in?" Rogue asked Kitty.

"Are you joking?" Kitty winced as she peeked to the ground at the war zone. Rogue gave her "the look" (you know the you better get going look). "Ugh. Fine." They army crawled toward their imminent doom.

_**Lance Attack**_

Lance tied a red strip of cloth around his head like he was freaking Rambo. He also rolled in the rich, dark earth and crouched low to the ground like he was looking to replace Sylvester Stallone.

_In the clear_, he smirked.

A cold metal barrel pressed against his spine. Kitty sauntered out from behind a tree ten feet away.

"Will you do the honors Katya?" Pete gestured at Lance, who had dropped his gun and held his hands up in surrender.

"But, you like totally trapped him. It's really not fair." She ambled closer.

"No I insist."

"You sure?" She scrunched her brow. "It's quite the opportunity."

"Please. I insist Katya.

"Okay." She aimed. A ball impacted in the center of Lance's gut in a pink sparkly mess.

"Ooof!"

"Pink is so your color. It looks totally great on you." She winked at Pete.

_**Scotty's Turn**_

Scott had this cooked down to a strategic science- or so he thought. He was hiding behind a dusty gray boulder when Rogue and Remy pooped on his left and right sides.

"Devious deceivers!" (If I have to tell you who said that one you really haven't been paying attention).

"Do you want to do the honors Swamp Rat?" Rogue smirked.

"You know Remy would love to chere. But I know you would too. We could share, non?"

"You?" She cocked a brow, "Share?" He nodded. "Alright then. On three."

"One."

"Two."

"Three!" They both squeezed their triggers. Remy's red paint stained one side, and Rogue's sparkly green paint stained the other.

"Owie", Scott wimpered as he crawled away to safety.

_**And then there were four**_

Rogue, Kitty, Remy, and Piotr met at the starting point.

Pete's silver paint etched several trees, pink and green glittering splotches littered the ground, ruby red drip lingered on the leaves.

The quartet formed a square. Pete diagonal from Kitty, and Remy diagonal from Rogue. They looked at each other. They each held up two paintball guns; one theirs' the other confiscated from a victim.

"So, this is how it ends", Kitty said, looking down the barrels at Remy and Rogue.

"I didn't want it to go down dis way." Remy looked around at Pete then Kitty. "I honestly thought someone would take you out first, den I wouldn't have to win dis way." He shook his head. "I just hope one of you is fast enough to get Rogue- it's not sometin' Remy want to do himself."

"Excuse me? At this point it's just who's fastest on the draw", Rogue objected.

"Not necessarily", Remy cocked a brow. "One of us could shoot right now while we banter and what not."

But where's the sportsmanship in that?" Pete raised an eybrow, "We're all friends her- this does not have to end badly."

Their eyes shifted upon one another. Uneasy glances wandered down the line of paintball guns. This could only end in pain. Seconds rolled by without motion.

Plop.

"What the-", Remy gasped.

A sea of blue and yellow paint exploded from a grenade in the heart of their formation.

"Ew!" Kitty squealed. "My hair!'

Rogue swiped a blue line of tie-dye paint off her shoulder and flicked it to the ground. _Didn't see that coming…_

Distant laughter lifted from the forest. Their heads swiveled toward the sound.

"You didn't honestly think I'd let any of you losers win did you?"

To say they looked confused would be a gross understatement.

"Wolverine?" they said in unison.

Nothing would surprise them ever again.

Seriously.

Nothing.

_**Later**_

They walked toward the sunset in a line of four.

"Ya know", Kitty looked up thoughtfully, "we make a pretty good team." They nodded, small smiles coming to their faces.

"Ah'd say we do." Rogue looked down the line, proud to be part of her unconventional "team".

**A/N: I don't think that some of the colors are actually achievable for paintball, but I do what I want. Please review.**


	16. Shadowcats Don't Like Water

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution.**

Kitty drifted over the lake on her little blue raft. She sighed; she'd meant what she said about the 'team' thing- yet she was floating alone.

Rogue lounged in a shady spot. She wore a cute vintage style one piece. It was bright cherry red with white pin drop polka dots (a gift from Kitty). Remy strolled up and planted himself next to her. _Geeze he has nice abs _(*sigh* is there nothing that isn't perfect about Remy LeBeau). She oogled him for a second. _Dang it! Stop looking!_

Pete sat on the shoreline, sketchbook in hand.

Kitty didn't want to get her hair wet, but did it matter? No one was looking at her any way, and though it wasn't as hot as the past few days, it was still pretty warm. She rolled into the surprisingly clean water.

_I didn't even get to use my stolen swag_; she sank to the bottom, eyes clamped shut. _Guess I should go up now. _But when she kicked her legs, she didn't go anywhere. She was stuck, tangled in some sea (well, in this case lake) weed. If she was smart she would have phased herself through, but she hadn't breathed in about a minute and she was disoriented. _Oh great…_

_**Meanwhile**_

Rogue looked lazily at the sky, then tilted her head toward Remy. She slid her glasses down and stared down the slope of her nose.

"You gonna say somethin' Cajun?" She looked back up, "Or are gonna sit there like a creeper?"

He shrugged. "We on decent terms again chere?"

She nodded. "Ah may have over reacted a little", she bit her lip. He raised an eyebrow. "Okay, a lot", she rolled her green eyes.

"So, you wouldn't be offended…", he checked her face to make sure she was still pleasant. "If Remy took you up on our wager." His anxious face almost seemed ready to be crushed.

She scowled, but a smile found its way through. "You would."

"Come on chere." He waited for a response.

_**At the bottom of the lake**_

_Great_, Kitty scrambled, _I can't even cry._ She smacked the water in front of her. _I'm going to die._

_Oh thank God! _A shadow figure splashed into the water and dropped to the bottom seconds before she thought she was going to black out.

Her ankle was loosened; she pulled up to the surface.

She, and her no longer mysterious rescuer, gulped in oxygen.

"Katya?" he breathed.

Kitty coughed up water, her chest heaving, _Oh yeah that's real attractive Kitty. Way to go._

"Katya are you all right?" He held her cheek in one hand, and kept her up with the other.

She nodded, still gagging up water.

He kissed her forehead, and started pulling her to shore. He held himself arms distance over her, smearing wet hair out of her face. Her coughing thinned. He fixed on her eyes.

"Are you all right?"

She gathered her voice. "Yes." _Gees, he's attractive. _Her eyelids fluttered. Her cheeks flushed. _And I must look real nice. Again, way to go Kitty, I'm on a roll now. _Her hot pink halter bikini dripping in the sand.

"Katya may I-" He cupped her face in his hand.

She nodded and he leaned-

SPLASH!

Moment. Ruined. Again.

Remy popped over the water's surface, grinning like he had just stolen the Mona Lisa or something.

_Okay? Really? _Kitty thought as Pete blushed and sat in the gravelly sand. _Remy, you are so on my list._ She sent death glares.

"You all right chaton?" Remy flipped the water from his hair. "You look a little pale." Kitty rolled her eyes.

_**Seconds Prior **_

Rogue debated crushing him. _Should Ah? To crush, or not to crush…_

"A deal is a deal cherie." Rogue looked away like she could care less. "Tonight?" she conceded.

"Really?" He grinned like a contented puppy.

She nodded.

Woo Hoo!" He smacked a kiss on her cheek and jumped into the still water.


	17. All Dressed Up with No Where to Go

**A/N: Do not own X-Men Evolution.**

"Good evening mademoiselle", he bowed as she stepped from the flimsy tent door. She rolled her eyes at his cheesy charm. She glowed a little bit- in spite of the fact that they were in the middle of nowhere, recycling the same clothes over and over. Her outfit (black leggings, turquoise shorts, and white tank) showed off her slender figure. He looked more than once.

"So Cajun", she drawled. "What are our big plans for tonight?" She folded her arms and popped her hip.

"Wouldn't you like to know", he winked.

"You're ridiculous." She shook her head.

"It's part of Remy's charm chere." He winked again.

When they arrived at their destination she was impressed. On one of the hills, at the edge of the forest, he laid out a series of beach towels. A rainbow of hot pinks, lime greens, and lemon yellows, with a tray of pillowy sugar dusted pastries in the center.

"How did you manage this?" She gave him a questioning look.

"I have a way of getting' things chere", he chuckled.

She breathed in the fresh smell of clean air, cool grass, and hot beignets. She popped a pastry in her mouth, he watched her, motionless. She caught him staring and choked a little, hot blush running to her cheeks.

"I figured we didn't exactly get to enjoy dem the other night", he shrugged.

_Something's weird here._ She studied him. _But what? _She strummed her fingers on the edge of a towel. _It's quiet! _Her face snapped up at him in realization. Remy LeBeau- quiet? Impossible! Not know what to say to a lady? It can't be! But it was; he was being… shy? A smirk touched her face.

"May I ask what's so funny chere?" He tilted his head.

"Nothin'", she shrugged, still smirking.

"Don' believe you." He played with the grass next to him.

"You're being quiet", she laughed.

"Remy's just observing." He met her eyes, relaxed.

"Observing what?"

"How pretty you look."

She turned away, an attempt to conceal her blush, unprepared for the compliment.

"Anyone ever tell you you're beautiful Cherie?"

Deeper blush. No response. "Stop." She finally said.

"Why ?" His brow furrowed. She continued to look away.

"Cause you don't", she stammered. "You don't know me Gambit." She avoided his eyes.

"Ain't dat what dis is for?" His eyes went to the fine line where the sky touched the ground, following the horizon.

"That would be fahn", she started, "if Ah didn't know you." She tugged at a loose pink string.

"I could be different", his voice softened, "if it was for you."

"People got a funny way of not changing Gambit."

He placed his hand over hers. "Sometimes they do." He squeezed her hand. "I'm not going to hurt you chere. I know I can't prove that- and you got every right to be suspicious", he looked down at their hands laced together, "but sometimes, you've got to have assurance for things hoped for." He looked up and held her gaze in a soft somber trance. "And I'm tellin' you- I'm promising you- you can have faith that I care enough for you to change."

_**Meanwhile**_

When Rogue left, Kitty headed straight for her contraband. She didn't want it to be a total waste.

It was an outfit, of course. She felt bad for not offering it to Rogue. _At least then someone would have gotten to see it. Ugh I hate you Bobby._ No, it wasn't Bobby's fault that no one got to see her fierce outfit, but it made her feel better to blame Bobby anyway. She consoled herself by knowing Rogue was too tall for it anyway. It was a black sequin tank mini dress that she paired with plumb colored patent leather pumps.

So now she was sitting alone in her perfectly fierce outfit in the dim tent. She sighed. The embarrassment of almost drowning was barely cancelled out by her awesome outfit. She twisted the patch of hair behind her ear into the epitome of awesome- yes, we're talking Jedi braid. She closed her eyes and mentally played What Hurts the Most by Rascal Flatts. _Dang Rogue and her affinity for country!_

A series of three light pats sounded on the door.

"What did you forget?",Kitty groaned. "Because if it's not important I'm kind of in one of those- I wanna go die in a hole- mood."

"Katya?"

"Pete", she jerked up. _As if anyone else would call me Katya. _She crawled to the door and opened it. "I, uh, thought you were Rogue." Face palm. "Hi."

"Hello", he smiled as she blushed.

"Yeah", she said. _So articulate. How do I turn into a bumbling buffoon when he's around? Great now I'm using alliteration like Scott. What's next?_

He nodded, still smiling. "May I…come in?", he asked raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, yeah def." She backed away from the door. _Double face palm._

He crouched inside. He sat with his legs bent, and arms folded. She finger combed her hair discreetly, and smoothed her mini dress.

"You look very nice Katya." He looked from her shoes to her sapphire eyes. She blushed. He tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "I wanted to make sure you were alright", his smooth, deep voice broke the silence.

"She nodded. "Yeah I'm fine." She recalled the coughing, gagging, drowning. "Thank you."

"Of course." He grabbed her hand and squeezed. "I am glad that you are okay."

She bit her lower lip. He looked up at the door.

"I should go."

"No!", she blurted. "I mean, like, you don't have to go." She held his wrist as he moved to stand, then retracted it.

A single nod, he relaxed.

Her dress sparkled, even in the dim light of the tent. Her shoes were fabulously shiny. But wait-

"Shoot", she accidently whisper-shouted.

"I'm sorry?", he said, looking confused.

"No! Not you. Like, totally not you- not at all", _babbling again_. "I- I forgot to put make up on." _Great. Now I sound so vain. Cue song: You're so vain…well actually it's more like I'm so vain…_

"You're beautiful Katya", he whispered in his delicious accent. "With or without make up."

Her inside melted to the consistency of Funfetti cake batter (all fun, colorful, and sparkly, like Kitty). He was close enough for her to feel the warmth of his breath and see all the navy and silver flecks of his deep blue eyes. _It's only a few inches…_ They leaned slowly toward each other.

"Katya", he whispered, his nose a fraction of a millimeter away from touching hers. "May I kiss you?"

She nodded once, closing her eyes.

"Their lips closed together. Kitty felt a warm glow descend upon her. In relaxed nervousness she leaned into him more. He wrapped his arms around her, tilting his forehead to hers. She blushed, and he did too. She closed her eyes, euphorically content, and sighed.

He pulled back. "Is something wrong?"

She shook her head. "No." Sparks rested on her skin where he held her. "Everything is perfect."

**A/N: Also don't own the above mentioned songs. Please review .**


	18. Let's Talk About Our Feelings, NOT!

**A/N: don't own X-Men Evolution. Duh.**

She clung to him- hands on his flat chest clutching his black t-shirt. He wrapped his arms around her, rubbing a flat palm along her back. She pressed her pale pink cheek just under his shoulder.

She hadn't uttered a word.

How could she?

After a patient silence, he cupped her face in his palms. "There's no rush chère. However long it takes to prove it, I'll wait."

She blinked- confused and dazed, all her feelings drawing to a reflection in his ruby eyes. She wanted to believe him- no; she did believe him.

She took a long shaking breath. "I don't need time Gambit," She wrapped her hands over his. "If you're saying it, I believe you." Her eyes dimmed and…

Then he shocked her (as he had a way of doing): he kissed her hand; not her parted peach lips.

"I know." He smiled. "But I'll prove it anyways."

She smiled in spite of herself, almost content in her unlikely choice.

_**Elsewhere**_

If she wasn't sure before, she was now: she wanted his babies- they would be tall Russians with blue eyes and crazy artistic skill. Yes, the sketch book was that amazing. The O shape of her mouth grew with every turn of the page.

"Peter," she finally choked out, "These are amazing," he reddened at the suggestion, but smiled slightly; he was painfully shy about his art, but he easily wanted to share this portion of his life with her. Something about her smile…

"Thank you," he said, reaching for the book and pencil. "Katya," he glanced at the floor, "I've wanted to draw you for quite some time, but felt it might be inappropriate," (_OMG. He's like, so cute!_) "Would you mind if I…"

"Of course not!" She said, stunned blush on her cheeks, "What should I… do?"

He chuckled and kissed the rosy part of her cheek, "Be natural: you're always beautiful." He smiled. "But if you would like to smile, it illuminates your features quite nicely." He tucked a loose hair behind her ear. (Would that ever _not _be totally amazing? She hoped not.)

So she smiled for him, feeling more pretty than she'd felt in her entire life- never mind that it was one in the morning and she had no make-up on.

_**Later (about 10 am)**_

"You're all glowy," Kitty grinned at her sleepy Goth friend.

"Geez Kit, you make it sound like Ah'm pregnant." Rogue rolled her dark green eyes.

"OhMyGosh. Is that a potential issue?" Kitty's eyes bulged the size of coffee mugs.

"Kitty stop!" Rogue laughed. "No. It's not possible. At all." She said as Kitty's near heart attack subsided. "And if you wanna talk about glowy…" Rogue looked Kitty up and down.

"Oh my gosh shut up!" Kitty giggled, burying her face in her pillow before neon crimson blush invaded her cheeks.

"It's about time too." Rogue rolled her eyes again. "He's had a crush on you from the moment he got to the mansion."

"Like you're one to talk!" Kitty giggled and tossed her pillow in Rogue's face. "You and Remy have like, had an unspoken thing from the moment you saw each other!" Kitty folded her arms over her chest as Rogue gaped.

"Uh. No." Rogue spat.

An amused smile played at Kitty's lips. "I like, can't believe you didn't even send me a postcard!"

"What?" Rogue's brow crinkled.

"From _da-nile_." Kitty cracked up. Rogue scowled.

_**Meanwhile**_

Remy strolled into his tent with a goofy grin sprawled over his features. Piotr glanced up at him.

"How was it my friend?" Piotr half smiled.

Remy opened his mouth, shut it, and shrugged with the same grin. "Remy now understands why you say dere is more to being wit' a girl."

Piotr chuckled. "I am glad you can fully appreciate Rogue as a lady- she truly is a wonderful young woman."

Remy nodded. "What about da Chaton mon ami?"

"She's…" Pete said "She is out of reach from all the words I could label her with."

They sighed. Then (upon realizing they were talking about their _feelings_) they shuffled through their stuff for something constructive to do.


	19. Now, What Have We Learned?

**A/N: I do not own X-Men Evolution. **

**Happy Fourth of July everybody=) enjoy!**

Kitty, eyelids heavy under the weight of boredom, leaned her head on Piotr's broad shoulder. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her temple. Honestly though, Logan's stupid meeting was bound to be a superfluous snooze fest (but, to be fair, her hyperactive mind had not been able to focus on anything but Pete and the prospect of going on cute little double dates in several days).

Rogue rolled her eyes and smirked at the sickening over affection- until Remy squeezed her up in his grip. "Why so far away Chere?" he whispered in a hushed voice that made her insides churn into a melted heat. He chuckled- empathy making him all too aware of her melty state. Rogue scowled, ready to sock him in the arm; but then he pulled her closer and kissed her fair cheek, and how could she be mad at that?

"Cease!" Logan bellowed and the murmurs halted.

The group exchanged skeptical side glances while Wolverine began pacing (I know, why so much pacing in this story? Truthfully I don't know- other than it is a good power action and I like pacing.)

"Chuck wanted me to do this. As a disclaimer it wasn't my idea."

Logan continued in a blind rant about how the Professor and he did not see eye to eye and blah blah blah. Remy's head tipped in a 'Remy-'bout-to-fall-asleep' way; Pietro drooled with a glassy stare; Bobby practiced crossing his eyes.

"So, since Charles says this trip was meant to be a _learning experience_ and I need to provide a forum for you to express what you've _learned_."

Silence. Blank stares trickled forward.

"So. Go for it." He flicked his hands forward like he was shooing away a pack of rodents. More silence. Logan sighed and rubbed his forehead. He had really hoped he wouldn't have to do it this way. "Alright, does anyone want to share something they've _learned_ through this experience?"

"I've learned that Hershey syrup stains don't come out even when you use Tide." Kitty muttered, eyes siring into Bobby.

"I've learned I'm cool, even when it's hot," Bobby clicked his tongue and winked; Jubilee rolled her eyes.

"I've learned that Gambit cheats in cards, fights, and paintball." Pietro glared.

"I've learned I can kick Pietro's butt at anything without even trying." Remy smirked.

"ENOUGH!" Logan calmed the sarcastic quips. "Does anyone have _any_ sincere experience they've learned from?" For a moment nothing; Scott eased his hand up. Logan nodded for him to proceed.

"I've learned that pranks are a juvenile practice. In the end, no one wins."

"Dats what da losers say." Remy muttered.

"One more wise crack out of you LeBeau and I'll sit you next to Drake."

But by now control was lost and chaotic spurts of laughter and sarcastic life lessons took its place. A shrill whistle silenced the gifted youngsters. All eyes went to Bobby; his hand dropped to his side. "I never got to tell my story!" he whined.

Logan pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed. "Alright snowball. Let's get this over with."

Now everyone turned to Wolverine: Logan- willingly allowing Bobby to spread his stupidity? Where was Apocalypse? The world had to be coming to an end.

"Alright- here it goes." Bobby rubbed his palms together.

_Long ago,_

"_In a galaxy far far away_," Rogue rolled her eyes as she muttered. Bobby continued like nothing happened.

_Not so far away, lived an evil, power hungry sorcerer. He was bald-_

"Bald?" Jubilees brow furrowed.

"Yes! Bald!" Bobby shook his head- unable to believe his audiences lack of attention span and inability to appreciate art. "Now where was I? Oh, yes-"

_He was dark, powerful, conniving- and he intended to use the dark arts to forward him to the throne._

"They so did not have kings in the US Bobby!" Kitty scowled.

"The king had a summer house here!" Bobby snapped- _geez, some people._ "Now sh! I'm tellin' the story."

_But, before he could summon enough power for his coupe, the king found his fortress and destroyed it, banishing him to this very forest._

_It is said that as he wandered the uncharted land, he worked to master the most difficult of the arts: shape shifting. It is said that over the many unsuccessful years, he went insane. No one knows what happened, but rumor has it that he mastered the art and lurks the forest, seeking his revenge as an unknown beast of unspeakable power: the great animal._

As Pietro opened his mouth to call BS, the camp fire went out with a gust, luring out a series of awed gasps.

A sudden explosion of flames burst in the sky- then the screams of terror really started. Maniacal laughter wheezed in the vague dark distance.

"Happy Fourth of July!" Pyro yelled. He cackled like a giddy school girl as he made a Teddy Bear dance with a dragon; Uncle Sam did a jig in the background. "I love America!" he said under a thick Australian accent.

"John!" Remy yelled. "Da fourth isn't 'till tomorrow mon ami!"

"Not in Australia!" Pyro continued in his psychotically jolly charade.

The group blinked in unison because: what does one say to that?

_If you can't beat 'em, join' em. _Remy shrugged and threw an array of pink cards in the air. Even Jubilee and Tabby threw up a few explosions, making it a real sparkly glowy celebration- even if it wasn't really the fourth of July.

Rogue inched closer to Remy's arm; the glittering bursts reflected in Kitty's eyes as she smiled up at Piotr. Yes, definitely fireworks.

**A/N: Yay=) guest appearance from John! I secretly love him in a weird you-gotta-love-that-crazy-guy sort of way… except now I guess it's not so secret. Ahaha.**

**Just as a clarification, Bobby's story is a very very tweaked mini version of The Swan Princess. If you love that movie as much as I do, gold star for you *:D. No, I do not own that either =(**

**Again, happy fourth! Enjoy your freedoms!**


	20. The Great Animal

**A/N: I don't own X-Men Evolution**

"John." Logan said in what-the-heck-is-this-loony-doing-here? fashion. "What are you doing here?"

"Well mate," John began, still jittery from his little celebration. "At first I was just doing a little show in the park, but then a few trees caught on fire and I was arrested- they called it arson! Arson!" He scoffed "_That_ was art!" He scowled. "So the professor did me a little favor by bailing me out- said sending me to the great outdoors would do me some good." He unleashed a toothy grin that made them further question his wavering sanity.

Logan, wondering how this could possibly be happening to him, pinched the bridge of his nose_. Honestly Chuck- why? _

Remy grinned and held back a snicker- he loved that unstable Aussie; they went way back, to the Acolyte days. Piotr, on the other hand, was slightly more afraid of his former teammate- though it is nearly impossible to not love John (come on guys- we all know he's flipping hilarious and how can anyone resist an Australian accent? ;); there was love, but there was still fear.

"Alright," Logan held his hands up in surrender. "Whatever Chuck says." It was almost amazing the power the professor had over the feral mutant- but then again, what man-beast didn't fear the threat of living under the delusion they were a cast member of Barney?

"Yippee!" John danced around, nearly setting a nearby tent on fire.

_**Later**_

Though John had been a decent distraction, a few whispers still swirled around the camp- Bobby's story _had_ ended up being a little on the creepy side. Even the slightest rustling brought covered worried glances and nervous sarcasm about how that was totally impossible. Rogue and Kitty scoffed every time anyone even mentioned "_The Great Animal_", knowing that it was just a very contorted version of The Swan Princess. But still- weird stuff had been going on around camp. At dinner, the lights randomly flickered out; in the middle of the night, the campfire would start glowing again (even though it had been thoroughly extinguished, and Pyro was asleep); there was splashing in the lake even though no one was in the water. Not particularly menacing signs, but still enough to put a few very tired, very delusional students on edge.

"This is such a load of crap." Rogue said bluntly. "Those are just Bobby putting together the best of his lame special effects to make people think his story was actually scary."

"I'm more scared of how he knows so much about The Swan Princess." Kitty giggled- she'd been in an overall giddy mood since she counted the days until she got to use an actual shower. The joy was almost too much to bear.

"This calls for a stakeout." Rogue scanned the camp "Ah say our final act of defiance is to embarrass the pants off Bobby and expose this pathetic prank for what it is." She stood from the picnic bench. "But we're gonna need some help." She stared toward the north end of the camp, where a certain Cajun's sly smile made the corners of her mouth tug upward (just a little). "And Ah know where we can get it."

"Awesome!" Kitty grinned, pulling a sliver of hair from behind her ear and started braiding. "You two are so adorable." She snickered.

"What?" Rogue said, snapping from her daze. "Oh whatever! You and Piotr are the most sickeningly sweet pairing to ever hit the planet!" She concealed a goofy smile with a scowl.

"What-ev-er," Kitty chimed in a sing song voice. "So spill: was the second kiss as _awesome_ as the first?" She faked a swoon and laughed. But then her sarcastic question was tinged with a serious undertone.

"Um-" Rogue looked away, a bit caught off guard. She hadn't really even thought about it.

"Oh my gosh. He hasn't?" Kitty's eyes widened, then narrowed with a Cheshire Cat style grin.

"Ah- Ah don't kiss and tell!" Rogue spat; she turned a hot shade of crimson under Kitty's stare.

"How cute he's being decent!" She smiled.

Rogue glowered, stomping off, abandoning the conversation.

_**Meanwhile **_

Remy grinned just looking at her. She and Kitty were giggling (probably over something ridiculous) - and he just loved to see her smile.

"I must confess comrade, I am very surprised."

"What?" Remy said, coming out of his dreamy state.

"At the change in you," Piotr chuckled. Remy nodded with a goofy smile. "She has not kissed you yet. Has she?"

Remy shrugged at the almost but not quite question statement. He didn't mind going slow- but he did have a reputation to uphold.

"Looks like we're about to _bust a mission _mon ami." He said, changing the subject as he observed Kitty threading a braid in her hair.

_**Later**_

Kitty smirked: stakeouts were totally awesome. She wore all black, a Jedi braid, and that black stuff football players put under their eyes. So. Awesome.

Gambit rolled his eyes. Kitty probably thought this was totally awesome, but stakeouts were probably as boring as it gets.

Rogue squatted behind a tree. If she couldn't literally suck the life out of Bobby, she would have to do it figuratively: by blowing the whistle on his stupid little scheme.

"Why are we so far away?" She grunted, squinting in the dark.

"So we can roll up in there MI: III status," Kitty smiled, thinking the Mission Impossible theme song. Rogue looked from Kitty, to Pete. With a small smile he shrugged, signaling that he liked her the way she was. Rogue rolled her eyes and trudged down closer to his tent.

"Where you going chère?" Remy whisper yelled.

"To get a closer look!" She called over her shoulder at a regular volume.

She leaned an ear on the grayish vinyl and her eyebrows scrunched together. She wrenched open the black zipper. _Ah don't believe it_.

"He's sleeping!" She whispered hissed at her friends.

Remy slid past her; his brow wrinkled at the sight. "Remy don't believe it, but dat's really Bobby."

"Then what's… _that_?" Kitty shuttered as a hazy swirling cloud of dark olive colored smoke rose from the center of the camp. Piotr took her hand protectively.

"Time to go." Remy grabbed Rogue's hand (clutching his Rosary in the other) and sprinted off to the forest.

"Isn't this like, its natural habitat?" Kitty shrieked as they weaved though the evergreens and oaks.

"Too late now petite!" He called, not really knowing where they were going when-

"Eep." Kitty let out a squeak at an enormous shadow of a huge creature on a nearby rock formation. They all stopped.

"Boo."

"AHHHH!" All of them (Pete and Remy included) nearly jumped out of their skins as they turned to face a dark cloaked figure.

"_The Great…Animal_?" Rogue choked out, unable to believe that Bobby had actually come up with a legit scary story.

Then the dark figure started chuckling- no, this was all out nearly hysterically laughter; unmistakable laughter.

"Logan?" They all gasped.

"You should have seen your guys' faces!" Bobby slid out from behind the rocks, clutching his side.

They couldn't even speak at that.

"_Bobby_?" Kitty squinted, unable to fathom what was happening.

"Bobby, _and_ Logan?" Rogue turned her head back and forth between the ludicrous pair.

"What can I say," Logan said "I couldn't pass up the opportunity," He chuckled.

"Yeahhhh!" Bobby said, raising his hand for a high five.

"No." Logan said, flatly rejecting the over affection. "I knew it was the one thing you pranksters wouldn't expect, so when Bobby laid out the proposition, well, how could I refuse?"

Remy through a charged pink card at the recorder in Bobby's hand.

"Hey!" Bobby snapped.

Gambit sent him a death glare: oh yes, they would be getting theirs.

_How could this have happened_?

**A/N: Soooo… I'm really sorry that it took forever to update =p things just got a little crazy. I hope it was worth the wait! And please review =) I love reviews.**


	21. The Revenge of Remy Crocker

**A/N: I do not own X-Men Evolution**

"This has bad idea written all over it." Rogue sighed as she slicked what Kitty called 'war paint' under her eyes.

"Come on now Chere," Remy cooed with a devious smile. "We gotta go out wit a bang." He chuckled.

Piotr opened his mouth, ready to agree with Rogue, but shut it when he looked at the enthusiastic bounce in Kitty's steps. She just looked so child-like; why crush her?

"Do we even have a plan?" Rogue tilted her head to the side, holding back some sarcastic comment about how their _plans_ didn't really matter, because they always went awry- she was still getting used to them being openly nice to each other.

He held his hand over his heart, wounded. "Of course mon chère! Gambit's always got a plan."

He winked; Rogue rolled her eyes; Kitty giggled.

_**Later**_

"Where did you like, find them anyway?" Kitty raised a skeptical eyebrow at Remy.

Piotr held back a snicker, knowing they were not "found" at all- they were _made_: with love (and Remy's secret affinity for baking). Remy shot him the don't-say-a-word look.

"Not important Chaton." He said. "What's important is dat our lil' fishies take da bate."

"Who wouldn't?" Kitty gushed, her tone wistful "They smelled amazing." She sighed.

"Back to da fishies!" Remy snapped.

Rogue did a mental face palm at the extended analogy- it was hard to picture Logan, the raging Wolverine, as a "lil' fishie."

"Time to split up" Remy said, again, letting Rogue absorb some of his powers.

Remy and Kitty crammed themselves (courtesy of Kitty's phasing powers) under the rickety wooden porch outside Logan's cabin; Piotr and Rogue waited outside of Bobby's tent, creeping outside his door like a bunch of… well… creepers. Rogue almost chuckled- the two with the most enthusiasm _would_ pair themselves together.

But at least she would be the one to ruin Bobby Drakes day.

So things weren't all bad.

_**Slightly Later than Later**_

Logan got up at the same time he always did; he marched to the door, pulled on the handle, and was about to step outside when-

He found a pie- banana crème by the smell of it- just sitting on his door step. He had never been one to pass up a good pie (especially not if it was banana crème). Next to it sat a note, a little ivory paper with tidy bold printing that said:

_Congratulations on a job well done._

That was odd- but, pie was pie. He shrugged and began to stick his finger in the whipped topping when-

KABLAHM!

The pie burst in his face in an explosion of banana and crème. Unknown to him, a certain raging Cajun had his hand phased through the floor boards, to charge an ace of spades taped to the bottom of the pie tin.

Logan snarled- with all the whipped crème frothing around his face, he looked like a rabid beast.

Remy and Kitty clutched their sides under the floor boards, gushing with silent laughter. Kitty's eye's watered; Remy slapped his hand over his mouth: great success.

Pie to the face, come on- classic.

_**Now for our dear Bobby**_

At the sound of a feral mutant storming through the camp, Bobby Drake rubbed his eyes and stretched as he eased through the door of his tent.

But what was this?

A Boston Crème pie, waiting for him just outside his door- a little gift from home.

Piped in whipped crème along the top read "To Bobby, From…"

Weird, but, pie was pie.

He reached in for a bite of the beautiful dessert when-

BAHM!

Boston Crème everywhere.

"Whoa!" He yelled as it burst in his face.

Rogue snickered at the girlish look of shock on his face- she wished she could look back at it in slow motion.

She had to admit, the Cajun was good.

**A/N: Pie to the face- cliché, I know. But I couldn't help myself=) **

**It might come as a bit of a surprise, but no: I do not totally hate Bobby Drake. But he's an easy target in terms of making stupid jokes. Just saying.**

**Please review!**


	22. The Last Supper

**A/N: I do not own X- Evolution**

Kitty was giddy; absolutely giddy. She chuckled like a crazy person: _that totally rhymes- giddy Kitty. Haha._ She swirled iceberg lettuce around with a fork, chasing a cherry tomato around on her plate with a Pyro inspired smile. She had totally survived this brutal, harsh, unfashionable environment and was ready to go home.

Piotr took her hand and focused into her blue eyes, a warm and amused smile on his face. "Katya," He almost chuckled at her strange grin. "Are you alright?"

Her eyes went all dreamy whenever he said her name- would the Russian accent ever make her insides _not _turn as gooey as Jet Puffed marshmallow crème? It was highly doubtful. "I'm great! I'm like totally awesome! Like, really awesomely great." She said, embarrassed that she had glazed over while he was still waiting for a response. _Still don't have the 'stop babbling like an idiot' thing down_.

Remy stabbed a silvery fork at Rogue's macaroni and cheese. She battered him away playfully as he tried to nudge her out of the way. "Remy stop it! If you wanted mac n' cheese you should have got some you're self!"

"Don't be stingy chère," he said, popping a triumphant bite in his mouth before she could swat his hand away.

Kitty lifted a plastic cup of sparkling cider, "Here's to a…sort of successful summer." She giggled, "And new levels of awesomeness."

"I'll drink to that," Remy raised his cup with a triumphant wink. "Here's to putting Scotty in his place." He smirked; Scott glared from across the dining hall.

"Here's to out pranking Bobby Drake," Rogue smiled reluctantly, nudging her cup in the air.

"Here's to comrades, old and new." Piotr closed with a nod and clinked his glass with the other three.

Everything had come together: Scott and Jean sat in the corner, hanging on each other's every word; Bobby had invaded Jubilee and Amara's table and was throwing down lame pick up lines; even the Brotherhood was bickering less than usual. Logan's eyes shifted over the campers- could it be? Peace? It was almost too much to hope for.

"I do believe," Remy drawled as he stood, "It is time for us to be going,"

Rogue gave him a what-are-you-talking-about look. He tugged her seat out from the table and threw her over his shoulder, sack of potatoes style.

"Remy LeBeau! What do you think you're doing?" She smacked him in the back. Remy saluted Pete and shot Kitty a wink. She rolled her eyes and laughed.

"She's going to kill you!" Kitty yelled as they exited.

"Gambit knows Chaton." He called over his shoulder as Rogue threw a mild tantrum.

He set her down in a grassy patch, where she promptly socked him in the chest. She scowled; he chuckled.

"Come on chère, Remy was only playing." He tilted his head with a devious smirk. She remained silent, with a glare that could make Wolverine back off. He leaned down and kissed her temple, and her face softened. He took her hand and sat with her as she looked up at the stars. Her green eyes glittered in the moonlight. "You know chèrie," he scooted closer to her, placing his lips millimeters from her ear in a way that made her insides twitch. "You never told us what you learned."

"What?" She turned her face toward his. She could feel him breathing.

"At Wolvie's little self help circle- what did you learn?"

She chuckled- the nick name never failed to make her smile. "Ah learned," she bit her lip and paused- looking for the just right answer. "Ah learned, that, being afraid, doesn't mean you can't have faith, to trust in people," she tilted her head with a light, mildly serious smile.

"Well then," He said with a smile. He picked up her hand and touched it to his lips for a long second. He leaned his face close to her face, placed a gentle hand under her chin. "Can I fix something chèrie?"

She nodded and he closed the gap between his lips and hers. She felt sparkly- _dang it! Too much time with Kitty!_

He pulled away with a goofy grin. "Now we have had a proper first kiss," he wrapped her up in his arms and she chuckled at the ridiculous memory. They sat under the stars, eyes locked, in a comfortable, content place.

_**The Next Morning**_

"So how was it?" Kitty finally blurted out after several jittery moments of bouncing in front of the bus.

"Was what?" Rogue blushed.

Kitty's smug grin made Rogue glower, then laugh. "It was better than the first."

Kitty snickered- she had totally called it from the beginning.

Their group of four huddled together in the back of the bus, their adventure coming to a glorious close.

**A/N: OMG! I can't believe it's over! I'm so sad! This story was like my child, and I adored writing it! Alas, all good things must come to an end, and the idea pool has dried up- but fear not! I plan to release a sequel sometime this winter! So look out for it =) I must say thank you to all my faithful reviewers (or if you reviewed period!) Seriously! You guys are totally awesome! Thank you so much! **

**If you liked this story at all, please leave one last review! Thanks!**

**S2 s-n-s**


End file.
